Open [boyxboy] ✓

fifty-two:: when sometimes you need self-closure.

But with Paul, I didn't care so much. I knew he didn't see me like that, I knew he wasn't going to make fun of me in the morning and he would be there if I got too drunk... but I wasn't yet.

"Babyyy, I'm not drunk." And I mean, I had a hard time believing that myself, his anger was misplaced though, I didn't mean to upset him and he wouldn't even look at me at that point and his opposite leg wouldn't stop shaking, arms crossed in that pouty Paul way. "Pablo." And I knew that would get him, him rolling his eyes as he moved to wrap his arm around me reluctantly.

He was still upset with me, I could tell, even in my buzzed state and it was making me kind of sad. There was something so distant about his, "Mhm," and I could feel him wanting to pull away from me. There had to be something more than the drinking, there was something on his mind and I just wanted him to stop worrying so much and have a drink with me. I hadn't experienced drunk Paul yet and if he could make me cum in under twenty minutes while sober...

Damn, he looked hot. There was something so attractive about the way his arms flexed in his plain white tee, especially when they were crossed. His tattoos were on display and there was a light sheen of sweat on his skin from the humidity in the room.

I knew I looked a mess but I was so comfortable with him, I didn't care much, my body pressed against his as I leaned my side into his chest. It wasn't planned when I had started kissing along his shoulder, my body was just moving without my consent but there was a shiver and he had reacted so slowly.

"Jules, stop." He didn't sound angry anymore and I wasn't quite sure if he was serious, sober me would've let go instantly. But his voice wasn't assertive and he was rubbing his hand across the lower exposed skin of my back and there was a raspiness in his voice, there were mixed signals and my lips had ended up on his neck.

Only then did he take action, hands gently going to push me away a little and I gave him some room, "Julian." he sighed, shifting so I could sit beside him, in between the arm of the chair and his body, me cuddling into his side in a clingy manner.

My hair was sticking to my forehead and I was hot in all the wrong places... and the right places. I wanted my boyfriend to stop looking so sullen though. "Why're you acting so sad? You're acting like me, I don't like me." Furrowing my brows, I leaned my head on his shoulder, playing with the hem of his tee shirt and his arm was back around me relaxing me a bit. There was a hand tracing comforting motions on my back and he'd tensed a bit when the words left my mouth. By then, I wasn't aware of everything I was saying and the way he went to kiss my forehead afterwards made me way too calm for the conversation.

"What're you talking about?" I wasn't paying much attention to what he was saying but I was sure he smelled like citrus and that smell made me think of my new car and the air fresheners and I was sure he was so far yet I could feel the warmth of his chest underneath my skin and through the fabric of our clothes. There was something so stiff about the way he moved and I just wanted everything to be so easy.

I was hot, why was I hot?

"You're m-mad at me." Trying to stop the stutter in my voice, I sat up a little and I didn't know what we were talking about anymore, not when he looked at me with those sad brown eyes. My body was vibrating with the bass of the song that was playing and I wanted him to tell me what was wrong so I pushed it, I pushed it until he became even more annoyed with me and me as a drunk was way more emotional than me sober... and I was a mess sober.

"Why won't you just t-tell meee? W-why are you mad?" Trying not to get too annoyed at the way he rolled his eyes, I hit his chest, not much force behind it and at that point, I was straddling his hips, knees pressed into the couch and the skin of my knee was so noticeable when pushed into the cushion. "Paul! Why are you mad at me?" There was this look on his face that said he wasn't going to answer that but I didn't care much for it. I was so hot and there was something wrong about the way my shirt was sticking to my skin, I wasn't drunk enough to take my shirt off despite how much I wanted to.