A Symphony Of Darkness [WATTYS 2018 LONGLIST] [COMPLETE]

XXII

Be brave.

You were fire, burning deep inside

The unquenchable cold of my heart

Till I smothered you.

This monster called guilt eats me up

From inside, and strangely, I crave it.

It's not you fault- you would have said

You would have lied.

You would have hidden those lacerations

Deftly, under your smile,

You would have protected me from myself.

Fixed my shattered soul; completed me; made me whole.

You would have made this complexity-

This complexity of our human nature-

Simpler for me.

Sometimes, your memory overwhelms me.

I caress my face in my hands,

Gather my regrets, collecting them together,

I cry.

I break.

There is no one to fix me.