Loaded

Tramp with soft hair

"What a crock" Howie complains, I bite my lip. He does remind me of myself.

Graces head swings around so fast, her face is red and steams coming from her ears. "You will not use that language again, I will not have you two embarrassing us in front of my family. Get out of line once and I will use your phone as a golf ball"

"Sorry" it's almost a whisper. I smirk to myself, I have never seen Grace lose control like that. I like it. I guess it's not only me who's nervous to spend time with our mother.

The journey takes forever, mother calls Grace 5 times asking where we are. Grace doesn't throw me under the bus she  blames our being late on traffic. Im great full as the last thing I need is mother having more ammunition against me.

Grace suggests we go straight to moms and that they would take me to the hotel after. I start to get nervous as we drive up the familiar street, I can feel the anxiety filling me. We pull up by the family home and my nerves are a wreck.

Mentally I'm giving myself a pep talk, my feet drag me. I really don't want to be here, why did my brother have to get married. What a selfish bastard.

I hear my mother greet Grace and her family, then I hear my dad. I smile , I love my dad so much. He is what makes it bareable to be here.

"Where's my little girl" daddy says as he outstretches his arms.

"Hi daddy" I say walking into his arms. He hugs me and tells me how great I look.

"Mother" I say as we awkwardly hug.

"You changed your hair, it looks better"

"Thanks"

"Come in, take your bags to your rooms and we will meet in the garden in ten. Where's your case"

"I'm not staying here, I have a room at the Hilton" I reply quietly.

My mother's face drops, she almost looks offended.  " I see, well your father will drive you after the BBQ"

I'm envious of Grace and her family that they got to go upstairs for ten minutes away from mother. I sit next to  dad on the patio and discuss what adventures I've had in New York. I omit a lot of info. Mother looks me over as we speak, more than likely she's thinking of what she can complain about.

"There's a man coming today that I would like you to meet, I'm pleased to see your presentable" mother says ruing the mood.

"Oh leave the girl alone, she's only 21. Savannah isn't ready to settle down"

"We were married and I was pregnant with Joseph when I was 21"

I bite my tongue, I was use to hearing this. It was said often, mother made it clear that I was not making her proud.

I decide to humour her, this weekend will be hard enough without me being difficult. Maybe I could behave so badly that's she just gives up.

"Oh great, what's he like" I fake interest but she thinks it's genuine. Her face lights up, my dad smirks he knows what I'm up to.

"He's 35 and based in Manhattan. Very successful and extremely attractive, I think you will like him"

"Really, does he look like my ex"

Mother grimaces as she remembers Theo my tattoo covered drummer ex boyfriend. "He certainly does not, he's clean cut."

"Darling the caterers are here I'll let them in" dad says, he's smart he's leaving before mother and I start to argue. Although Theo didn't fit in with my fathers country club world he actually liked him, my mother not so much.

"Caterers, I thought this was a bbq"

Mother looks at me like I have two heads, "it is, you've been in New York too long. Did you really think your farther would be stood over the grill all afternoon in a kiss the chef apron. I think not, don't be ridiculous"

"Of course what was I thinking, so where's Joseph and Toni, what's Toni like anyway"

Mother sneers "they will be here shortly, Toni is a divorcee with two kids. He could do better"

"Joseph has been divorced"

"And" she says not getting my point. Before I can reply I'm saved by my brother and his new wife's entrance.

"Sav is that you, where's the red hair gone" Joseph asks as he pulls me in for a hug.

"Red hair" Mother days touching her own grey curls, it's clear she's appalled at the thought.

"We had lunch last time i was in the City and her hair was bright red"

Thanks for that Joseph, way to throw me in the deep end. I turn away from my mother in hopes of changing the subject.

"So are you going to introduce me to your beautiful wife"

The garden starts to fill, I learn that Toni is down to earth and it was her who had insisted on a real bachelorette party. I was pleased to find we were really going out clubbing and Toni was adamant we had to get drunk.  I still couldn't believe that my mother wants to come along, she's never been a bar or a club. The country club doesn't count.

My mother is in her element as she greets her guests, she was made to be a hostess. I make the rounds with my dad who gushes about me, he tells anyone who will listen how glad he is to have me home. He tells anyone who will listen that I make my own money and have yet to dip into my trust fund.

"Don't look now your mothers coming with your new husband" dad jokes.

"Help me" I mouth. He walks away quickly before my mother can catch him. He's a pro in avoiding her now.

"Savannah, there's someone I would like you to meet."

I close my eyes and take a breath before I turn.

My heart stops "Jason"