The Conflicted

3.

Abel

I was mesmerized by seeing Nonie because I hadn't seen her in an extremely long time. I guess I kind of felt weird because the day I left, we never bumped into each other-not once.

I can't lie, I missed her for a long time, but I couldn't bring myself to stop by her place-and one day I did but she was gone.

You could tell she hadn't been there for a while because the grass was dead, extremely over grown, the house had mold growing on the bricks, and her mail was spilling out the mailbox.

I drove by her place a few times at night and there were never any lights on. Her home was like a ghost town and I was afraid that she'd disappeared and left forever. I even placed gifts on her porch for her birthday and they never moved.

Even though I left the woman I truly loved, it broke me, but it broke her even more. My intention in leaving her was to stop causing her pain and instead, I made it even worse and I tried looking for her.

Even my best men, my XO brother's looked for her too, excluding Lamar because he'd always have something to do when we tried looking and there wasn't a damn trace of her to be found so, eventually I gave up because I figured she went away and really didn't want to be found.

And when she finally bumped into me after a year of her being gone-I nearly jumped out of my boots. I was feeling so many emotions at once-relief-happiness-shock-and mesmerization.

I thought I had lost my hope and that I'd never see the one and only woman that truly meant the world to me ever again. My doubts and sadness all disappeared as soon as I saw her beauteous, vibrant, and and soft face.

My mind exploded and all of my thoughts scattered incredibly throughout my head. I had so many questions and I knew she didn't want to see me or have anything to do with me which explains the fact why she ran from me, why she didn't speak to me, and why she didn't even crack a smile.

I wish that I had never fucked things up between us. It's all my fault and I hate myself for it everyday.

~~~~~
After Nonie left me on the sidewalk-dumbfounded-I watched the car drive off until it was nowhere in sight-I walked back over to Bella and didn't notice the paparazzi had caught everything on camera.

Bella looked embarrassed, but I didn't care. I planned on ending shit between her and I tonight anyway.

She grabbed my hand tightly whereas I didn't even clasp my hand with hers. We walked into the restaurant and sat immediately.

~~~~~
After the dreadful evening Bella and I spent at the dinner table together, we were on the way back to my place when she started running her mouth.

"Abel! Why the hell would you embarrass me like that?" She asked obviously upset.

"Bella, not now." I said as my mind was already flooded with my thoughts.

"No Abel! This is unacceptable! I'm so sick and tired of you not being considerate of my feelings and always dismissing my emotions." She said; yelling at me.

"Damn it Bella! Shut the fuck up! All that little kid shit needs to go! You're always fucking crying and bitching, like goddamn do you ever stop?" I yelled louder and gripped the steering wheel.

"Why don't you ever care?!" She asked in a high pitched squeak.

"Bella, stop. I'm warning you." I said; sternly.

"What are you gonna do? Leave me for someone? Oh! I know who-that bitch you chased after-that stupid whore!" She screamed.

I slammed on the breaks and jerked the car to the right before putting it in park on the side of the road.

"Shut the fuck up you stupid broad! You don't know shit about that woman! And you know what? I don't give a shit about you or your ma-fuckin' feelings you know why?"

"Because I don't respect you and I could care less about you! You ain't shit but a publicity stunt and another plate of pussy to me. You'll never be shit."

"Don't you see? I used you! All of you-I used-I will never love you. I love one woman and that's her. It's fucking over, get the fuck out of my car!" I seethed with rage.

Her face was drenched of tear stains and her eyes filled with horror.

"Didn't you hear me? I said get the fuck out! Useless bitch!" I yelled again.

She wasn't moving so, I got out of the car, walked over to her side, and yanked her frail, thin, and small body from the seat and threw the rest of her shit at her.

"Where am I supposed to go? What am I supposed to do?" She asked; stupidly.

All I could do was laugh. I shook my head and laughed at this bitch. I got back into my car, locked the doors before she tried to open it, and cracked the window.

"You have a phone, you keep saying there's no one, and there's no where to go, but who keeps callin' on your phone? I suggest you use it and get your shit out of my crib, by tonight, or I'm sellin' that shit." I said before I sped off home.

On my way home, I called up Lamar and the boys. Now that I didn't have to deal with Bella's bitching and complaining, I thought we'd celebrate.

Nonie

I was in shock and I just wanted to get back to where I needed to be so that I could read, be by myself, cry-if I needed to-and go to bed.

I was so silent and zoned out that I must've worried Gerald considering the fact that I was basically quiet for the whole ride.

"Nonie, are you okay?" He asked gently.

And every time he'd ask, my answer was the same as before.

"I'm okay." I said.

But I knew that I was lying.

"Oh, okay." He replied.

~~~~~

"Goodnight beautiful." He said before kissing my forehead after he walked me inside.

I smiled a weak smile.

"I'll see you tomorrow." He added and disappeared.

I walked back to my room, fearing that I'd have to face ALEXANDER again, but he never showed up.

How do you feel about this chapter?❤️

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Do you think they'll last?💙

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XO.💋