FIXATION

27. Oxytocin

No one was able to account for exactly what happened to Raguel in the two hours before he flat lined, but everyone knew that he wasn't himself in those last six weeks.

"Hey," Theo greeted Raguel with a quick kiss at the door. He had his apron on, the yellow one that read: [best (cock) cook ever], and the kitchen smelled like vegetables. "How was your weekend?" he turned back to the food, just about finishing.

"Good," Rags shrugged, walking around the counter to stand behind Theo, and his hands came to rest on his sides. "Yours?"

"Boring without you. It feels like we haven't seen each other in months. I miss you." He pressed his hips back playfully against Raguel's.

Rags smirked, pressing back. His arms slithered around Theo's waist, crawling down his torso.

"Hmm, let's have some dinner first." He turned around, brushing some of his purple hair from his face. "And maybe we can do this another night; I'm really sore from dance..." he frowned as his eyes met Rags', and slowly his hands reached up, taking their time as if every second decreased the chances of what he saw to be true. But when he removed the glasses, his eyes were still bloodshot and Theodore hissed, "Are you high?"

Raguel sighed and Theo huffed, shaking his head and shoving away from Raguel to finish the food. "Unbelievable," he murmured.

"I'm sorry, ok? I didn't even have much, I promise-"

"No, Rags." He spun around. "I don't care how much or how little you had – I asked you to keep that shit away from me, but clearly that had no effect."

"Theo...please?"

"It's me, or drugs. You choose." His black ice eyes turned away from him and he was faced with a mess of red instead as Theodore finished making dinner.

The whole night after that was tense and silent, and even as Theodore stood in front of the bathroom mirror brushing his teeth, he was visibly annoyed, his eyes stern when Raguel came to stand in the doorway. He tossed one of Montgomery's toys – a soft Pokeball – at Theo's shoulder weakly, trying for a bit of a smile. "I choose you," he whispered.

Theo spat the tooth paste from his mouth, murmuring. "Did it take you this long to decide that?"

Rags stepped, shifting his weight briefly, eyes darting from tile to tile. "I'm sorry..."

The break in his voice caught Theo's attention and he sighed when he saw the sad look on Raguel's face. He rinsed out his mouth and turned around, hugging Raguel, who hugged back tightly. "Sometimes I forget you're only nineteen and you still need someone to keep an eye on you from time to time."

"From time to time? I need you all the time. Please, I don't know how else to stop this... it's not just weed anymore." His voice was shamefully soft, his fingers clenching around the fabric of Theo's pyjama shirt desperately and Theo held him closer to comfort him.

"You're going to be ok Rags. You can stop."

"How?"

Theodore didn't know. How was he supposed to know? He knew nothing about drugs. "Every time you feel like having a blunt or a... whatever..., kiss me. Look at me, hold my hand, and replace all that crap with me. I'm here for you, always."

Rags nodded softly, "Ok... Thank you."

He rubbed his back softly, and kissed his shoulder. "I love you Rags."

"I love you too..." he whispered.