FIXATION

20. Teddy Bear

Raguel watched from behind the bar as Lucifer danced over a seated woman, a mildly attractive woman who had cheeks redder than the blush she'd applied and whose hands clutched the edges of her seat in order to obey the neon no touching sign that flickered above the stage, right next to the red neon sign that was only on during Friday nights.

No Strangling the Dancers

"Good to see you're back. Should I ask why you weren't here Monday?" Megan sat down at the bar, her black curls framing a parental glare and curled lips.

Raguel replied by fixing her her usual drink and shaking his head. "Thank you for still paying me. I assume he...?" he nodded towards Lucifer, who had his pelvis in a woman's face.

Megan nodded. "He seemed really worried about you; I've never seen him that stressed. Did you two at least talk it out?"

"Not exactly."

"Well you better." The firmness in her voice made Raguel look up from the glass he was cleaning and he wished his glasses were one-way, so Megan's suddenly scary eyes couldn't see the fear in his. "I care about Theodore and he's worked very hard to get to where he is now. If you hurt that boy's heart, he's not going to recover, you understand? He's about as naïve as a teen girl. I wouldn't be surprised if he's already thought of names for your children- what I'm trying to say is he really likes you Raguel, and if there's even a chance you can't reciprocate the feeling, you better get out of his life right now. Understood?"

Raguel nodded. "Understood."

Raguel and Theodore hadn't talked since he found him at the dorms on Monday and Theodore didn't seem to see him while he was working either so it was a little awkward when Raguel stood outside the backstage door, waiting with car keys in hand for Theo to come out.

He had a grey jacket on, the one with the fluffy inside and holes for his thumbs and was too big for Raguel but Theo still let him wear when it was cold. There was a bit of surprise and a brief smile in Theo's orange streetlight eyes, but then a sour expression. "Decided you'd show up this time?"

"I'm not high," Raguel muttered. He looked apologetically up at Theodore and spoke softly into the cold midnight air, "Let me drive you home? Please."

Theo sighed and his eyes detoured from Raguel's face to the pavement and the streetlamp and to his car. "Yeah, ok."

Theodore unlocked his apartment door and went in, then turned to look at Raguel who stood in the hallway with disappointment on his face. "No goodnight kiss?" he tried for a smile, even though he knew he shouldn't expect it from Theodore.

"Are you stupid?" Something in Theo's voice reminded Raguel of Megan's tone earlier and he wondered if the scowling man in front of him really liked him that much if he so easily made Raguel take a step back in hurt. His lips quivered in search of a reply, but he found none.

Theodore rolled his eyes, reached out to grab Raguel's hand, and pulled him into the apartment. This time he wasn't pinned against a wall, but he was wrapped up in Theo's arms, pressed into his chest. He slowly curled his arms around Theodore's neck, face in his neck. "I'm sorry," he murmured.

"It's ok...I was out of place to act out like that. You're a college kid, and it's none of my business if you want to try things like that. Just..." he pulled away to look at Raguel, "please don't let it get in the way of college. Or us."

"I won't."

"I had absolutely no idea strippers made this much," Raguel said as he helped Theodore count the money that was stuffed into his jockstrap during the night.