date (book #1)

entry #5 (part 1)

you wanted to talk today.

about you,

about me,

about us.

i thought that this was it,

i knew it was too good to be true,

but i held on for hope.

the hope that you would love me forever

as i would love you.

you were always the popular one.

loved by all

and chosen by many.

yet you had chosen me.

little,

boring,

plain,

eyesore,

disgusting,

me.

girls would flock to you,

guys would shake (from jealousy) when they saw you.

you had it all.

i often wondered if i was worth it to you.

to me,

i wasn't worth the time,

i wasn't worth the effort,

i wasn't worth that million dollar smile of yours.

i wasn't worthy of you.

my parents often told me that i was

a disgrace,

and embarrassment,

a complete and utter failure,

i shouldn't have been born.

a mistake.

yet you showed me what i never believed to be me.

you showed me

love,

care,

compassion,

loyalty.

you awoken feelings within me that i didn't even think could light again seeing the situation i was in.

but you brought me back,

back from the dark hole.

that hole was a little bit smaller now because of you.

and as i prepared myself for the worst,

i'll remember every single damn thing you told me that was worth it.

because you loved me.

and i love you.