Dream

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Trigger warning - dream ⚠️

I was walking down the sidewalks of New York when I felt someone in my presence. I started to run, but whoever was following caught up with me and aggressively put their hand over my mouth. They brought me to an ally, I couldn't move at all.

"Stop!" I cried as he started getting more sexual. His hands were all over me. He bit my neck making me cry out in pain. I still couldn't move. He then started to unbuckle his pants.

"No no no please don't," I cried once more. He didn't stop. Then he started to undress me. Then THAT happened.

He didn't stop, and I was helpless I couldn't move or see. All I felt was a pain.

He finally stopped and just left me there, on the cold hard concrete ground.

......

I shot up in bed, gasping loudly. Tears sprinting down my face.I brought my knees to my chest and hugged them tightly. I heard footsteps in the hallway through the door. Daveed walked into my room.

"Oh summer, what happened?" He asked sitting on the edge of the bed. I kept crying and I couldn't stop. "Summer you need to tell me."

"I don't need to tell you anything," I snapped, tears still streaming down my face.

"Summer, you need to tell me what's wrong so I can try to help you," he pleaded taking my hand in his own. I yanked my hand away.

"It's none of your fucking business, so get the fuck away from me," I screamed through the tears. He sighed putting his head in his hands.

"Summer, watch your language," Daveed said sternly.

"NO, leave me the FUCK alone!" I screamed. "Go away!" I said turning away from him. He sighed in defeat and got up off the bed.

"Fine, try to get some sleep. I'll be in my room if you need me," Daveed sighed again making his way out of the room. I laid back down on my bed, resting my head on the soft pillow. Every time I closed my eyes, I got flashes of all the things that happened yesterday.

"Are you gonna eat that?"

"I'm perfect!"

Flashes of the guy that tried to sexually assault me. The things he could've done... If I didn't get away.

I didn't know what to do, should I tell Daveed? Should I talk to him? NO, he won't believe you. He'll think you're crazy or stupid. Weak. Useless. Pathetic. Then he'll send you back.

All these thoughts going through my head at once. I was telling myself I was worthless, weak, ugly, fat. The thoughts screaming in my head wouldn't stop. Tears still sprinting down my face, eyes wide open as I cried as silently as I could. I couldn't breathe. I had my head in my hands. I felt I was going insane.  The emotional and physical agony was killing me. My head hurt from all the thoughts, my chest hurt as I tried to slow my breathing. I couldn't take it anymore. I almost called out to Daveed, but I didn't want to bother him. The thoughts kept getting worse and worse.

Ugly.

fat.

useless.

worthless.

kill yourself.

A fucking idiot!

I got out of bed and headed to the bathroom. I looked in the mirror at my tear stained face and red puffy eyes. I turned on the tap and splashed water on my face. I walked out of the bathroom stubbing my toe hard on the door frame.

"SHIT!" I whisper yelled and clutched my toe. I hopped back to my room and sat on the bed. I scanned my toe for injuries but couldn't really see any since it was dark. I laid down on the bed and closed my eyes, finally starting to calm down. I finally drifted off into a dreamless slumber.

.......

I woke up the next day not wanting to get up. It was finally Saturday so I didn't have to. I felt tired as fuck and had a headache.

I eventually got up after just laying there for a while. I headed downstairs, still in pyjamas and looking like shit.

"Morning," I said to Daveed who was sitting in the kitchen.

"Ah, actually its 2 in the afternoon," he corrected. I mentally facepalmed looking at the time. I sat down on the counter seat beside him. "How did you sleep?" He asked sipping from a glass of water. I shrugged.

"Terrible," I sighed rubbing my eyes. Laying down on my arms on the counter I sighed again.

"You know, you can talk to me," Daveed said again. I sighed once more.

"I really really want to talk to you about this... But," I didn't know how to explain it. "It's hard to explain, and I don't exactly know how to explain," I sighed.

"I understand, just know you-"

"That I can talk to you, yes I get it," I interrupted. "So what's happening today?" I asked.

"Well, I was thinking we would go to the store so we can get you a new phone. Since you got your iPod thrown out," Daveed replied.

"Wait are you serious? That's too expensive," I said.

"Of course I'm serious. Go get ready," he said. I got off from the seat and headed upstairs. I put my hair in a ponytail. Then I put on some leggings and a t-shirt. I put my socks on and headed back downstairs.

"Ok, let us go!"

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