Poker Face ✔

Chapter 55

Hi all,

The song attached really sets the tone for this chapter and all that Taylor is going through right now. So please go check it out :)

Thank you

Happy reading!

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I glared at my reflection in the mirror where I spotted blue and purple bruises the shape of fingerprints around my neck.

My family had been warning me about eighteen-year-old Daniel Ashton. He was me, basically. He was angry, on edge, immature, out of control man. My birth taught my dad how to love; how to be at peace. He doesn't remember me, therefore is not the same man as he was before his coma.

I climbed downstairs to find Chace doing the dishes whilst Aunt Kat, Rosemary, and Michael was sipping coffee around the kitchen table.

"You know he's worried" Chace sigher whilst scrubbing the dishes, not giving me any eye contact despite the fact that I was standing beside him "he hasn't stopped calling the house for the last few days"

We were talking quiet enough for the others not to hear anything. Jack was someone that I was avoiding, I didn't know exactly why I just didn't feel like talking to him.

"Since when do you care about Jack?" I raised an eyebrow.

Chace hated Jack; well more like me and Jack's relationship. That's why he always rolled his eyes or left the room when we were together.

"I don't" he started "but at least I'm humane"

"Excuse me?" I raised a brow 

"I mean the guy loves you and you're just shutting him out like he doesn't mean anything" Chace said, "is that how you treat those you love?"

"Chace I just need sone alone time...is wanting to be alone inhumane?" I asked him.

"No of course not" Chace shook his head "just the way you operate"

I clenched my jaw. "And what's that supposed mean?"

"You don't realize that you're doing it but you're pushing everyone away...I don't know why but chu are...your screaming at us when we're trying to help you...you're making us all worry about you and its like you don't even care...if you want my advise...you should call your boyfriend, tell him you're okay and that you're sorry for not calling"

"Right" I nodded "cause everything's always my fault, right?"

"That's not what I meant" he rolled his eyes.

"It was implied" I nodded "look I don't wake up every morning and decide I'm gonna be a pain in the ass-"

"So it just comes naturally then?" he snapped, "look you should be sorry for treating us all like shit...you have no idea what these people would do for you"

I nodded thinking about their motives. They are all just using me. "No I got a pretty good idea" I said as walking in the opposite direction.

I went to my family's gym that was located within the mansion. There I found Lila, Kyle, aunt Christina, Jameson, and Sage, all doing their own thing.

I started on the treadmill; that's when I felt the most like my self when I was running as fast as could. I felt the most myself when I was running away. I wonder what that says about me?

I was on that treadmill for two hours before finally going upstairs to have a shower in my ensuite. Hot showers felt the best when you were the feeling the way I was at that moment. I felt like I was losing my mind; the best cure for me was dumping myself in to work.

The water against my skin reminded me of nocte fractorum when I was laying in that lake with uncle Donny's lifeless body only a few feet beside me.

I finally shut the water after half an hour before putting on a white towel robe. I entered my room where I find a familiar man sitting on the edge of my bed.

"Taylor" he sighed as standing up. His eyes looked a combination of worried, frustrated, annoyed, and afraid. "What happened?" He took a few steps towards me, gripping my hands gently, forcing me to look into his beautiful light blue eyes.

I then kissed the man passionately before pulling away, pressing my forehead against his. "I'm sorry" I whispered "I'm sorry"

"You're starting to scare me Taylor" Jack whispered back "why didn't you call?"

"I don't know" I admitted "I don't know what's happening to me Jack...I feel like I'm losing my mind"

"Its okay" he sighed "it really is"

I didn't tell him about Gabe; I had no intention to. Apart of me knew that 'this' wouldn't last much longer.

I kissed Jacks lips passionately whilst running my fingers against his five o'clock shadow then through his taper fade haircut. I pushed him to my bed whilst removing his coat than my robe; exposing my fully naked body.

"Taylor" he sighed.

"Hmm" I kissed his neck.

"Taylor your family's downstairs" he reminded me but I just kissed his lips as attempting to remove his shirt.

His hands were nowhere near my body; he just sat there.

"So" I laughed.

"Taylor please" Jack jerked his body away from mine "someone can walk in". I kiss him again as taking his hands and placing them onto my breasts. "Taylor" he begged as pushing me a few feet away from him.

"What's wrong with you?" I cried.

"your family's downstairs" he sighed.

"So that never stopped you before" I pointed out as looking into the eyes of the man sitting on the edge of my bed. "What is it me? Don't chu want me?"

"Someone can walk in" Jack repeated.

I knew that to be complete bullshit. 

"Get out!" I ordered as pointing to my bedroom door. I could feel my eyes burn whilst glaring at him in anger. He just sat there. "Now!" I screamed but he doesn't budge, "fine have it your way" I slipped on my robe and marched downstairs.

I ended up getting high in the laundry room that night. That's what I did when I felt the way I was feeling in that moment. I sat on the cold hard tiles in the laundry room and just smoked.

the man sighed whilst walking in on me, to find that I was on the floor, high with my robe undone.

The man facepalmed. He looked so beautiful, there with his diamond grey eyes, Blondie brownie hair, medium skin tone. I knew who the man was despite the fact that he looked different when I'm high.

"Hey, its a party!" I began laughing.

"What is it?" another voice started.

"Take a look," Chace said as pointing at me.

"For fuck sake" a woman cussed as kneeling at my feet to tighten my robe.

"You're pretty" I grabbed my aunt Kat's cheeks.

"you stink Taylor," she informed me.

My vision had been greatly impaired, everything was a blur. 

"Oh for the love of-" another voice said a looking ag ne.

"Hey, man want some" I lifted up my cigarette and pointed it to my uncle Jared.

"Chace I want you to air this place out" uncle Jared barked "Kat...deal with this please"

"This has a name you know" I hissed as taking another drag.

When did I start being referred to as 'this', 'you', 'that' or even 'it'? The answer is 2009.