Exotica

Pretend It's Ok

◇ Omniscient ◇

"Here," Quinten extends his hand to give his wife her steaming cup of morning coffee. She mumbles a thank you and scratches her head while taking the mug from his hand. "How are you feeling?" He questions not forgetting about the breakdown she had two nights ago. She promised him that she was fine but the fact that she took a three hour shower with the bathroom door locked proved otherwise. She was far from fine, she knew it and so did her husband. "I'm good." She assures him, wrapping her hands tightly around the mug and taking a long sip.

"You make my coffee better than I do." She jokes. "I try." Quinten responds, sitting down beside her. Amini pulls her legs to her chest and rests her chin on her knees still while holding her cup of coffee. The two remain silent as they look into one another eyes, seeing the truth within each other, Quinten realizing that his wife was holding back on telling him something. Amini noticing, looks around their bedroom, avoiding eye contact. She knew that her husband understood her with ease whenever she was vulnerable and she didn't want that right now. His main focus has been on Yesenia and she wanted to keep it that way. Her husband was already stressed enough and the last thing she wanted was to add more therefore, she had to pretend that everything was okay on her end until further notice.

"How is Yesenia?" She questions, trying to remove the thick tension from their bedroom. Quinten pushes his glasses back to the bridge of his nose and carefully looks at his wife then releases a sigh. "She's doing good. I've been having some sessions with her here and she's slowly opening up to me." He says falling back on their messy bed. "I'm still nervous about what the judge has to say." He admits looking up at their ceiling. Amini places her cup of coffee down on her nightstand and gets out of bed. "Don't be." She responds in a low tone of voice while making her way to their spacious bathroom. Quinten sits up, using the support of his elbows and looks at Amini. Her tone of voice wasn't sitting well with him nor was her demeanor. She just seemed so careless and nonchalant to him which was rare for her unless she was angry with him.

"Are you mad with me, did I do something wrong these last few days?" He questions. Amini grabs her toothbrush out of the holder and looks over at him, shaking her head no. He watches as she does her morning routine in silence which was uncommon for her. She always had something wild or funny to say at random so her being quiet out of the blue was a red flag for him.

"Are you sure?" Amini cuts the water off and exits out of their bedroom, she climbs back into their bed and gets under the warm satin bedsheets, pulling them over her head while trying to find a comfortable position.

"My love." Quinten speaks, gently tapping her. Amini removes the sheets and looks over at her husband. He sits up when he see's her eyes glossing with tears. "Qué está mal." He mumbles. Amini stretches and lays on her back, staring up at the ceiling. "I don't know Spanish, babe."

"What's wrong?" He speaks. Amini tucks her lip, fighting tears. She desperately wanted to tell him but she couldn't, her heart was telling her to while her mind told her to keep quiet; her mind and heart were at war with one another and she didn't know who to side with.

"I'm just really tired, that's all. I've been working my ass off non-stop and I'm just kinda overwhelmed by it all." Her eyes beam with tears which results in her turning her head and looking out their bedroom window at the morning sky. "I'll be okay though." She quickly adds turning back to look at her husband.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." She lies. Truth is, she was coping with the pain. Hoping that it would fade after a few days. Telling herself that it was something small and she could handle it but, her brain still had trouble processing what had happened. She knew what happened but she didn't want to believe it. She didn't want to believe that she had reached that stage of vulnerability yet again; determined to leave it's mark like the last time.