problems // ben tyler cook

Chapter Thirteen

I didn't think I'd cry when Ben leaves for tour. I didn't think I'd be so heartbroken that I wouldn't leave my apartment for a month- other than to attend shows- and would lay in bed all day.

"You can't spend all your time in your apartment, Rose." Zack, who plays the Beast, tells me one Friday before a show.

Zack and I are actually really close. We had instant chemistry from the beginning of the show all the way until the present- but we'd never date. Zack has a fiancé anyway.

"Actually, I can." I shrug, fixing my wig a bit.

"Oh come on." He rolls his eyes. "Christian is having a party at his apartment tonight and the whole cast and crew is invited."

"I can't drink. There's gonna be alcohol."

"Seriously, Rose? I've gotten drunk with you before." Zack chuckles. "Just come. You don't have to drink if you don't want to. Just have a good time. You've been all depressed since Ben left and frankly, I'm tired of you being so upset all the time. You had a life before him, and you're damn sure gonna have a life while he's gone. It's not like he died."

A Newsies quote comes to mind, but I don't blurt it out.

I groan. "Alright, fine, I'll go. But only to get you to shut up."

"Yes!" He cheers, kissing my cheek. "See you tonight!" He shouts over his shoulder as he leaves to go get ready.

****

I change after the show into something that's a little more revealing than what I'd normally wear, but I'm feeling confident today. I've lost a lot of weight recently, and Andrew hasn't been making a lot of comments about my weight recently. So I must be doing something right!

I head over to Christian's apartment after stage dooring, sending a quick snap to Ben to tell him goodnight. He snaps me back with a picture of him laying in bed, looking cuddly and adorable. I want nothing more than to fly to him and curl up in his arms, but someone honks at me and I have to keep driving.

"Hey girl!" Leila cheers as I walk into the loud apartment. "Here, drink! You need to loosen up."

Zack is right, I have gotten drunk with him and the cast before. I know it's wrong, but I do need to let go and have fun for a night.

Shrugging, I drink whatever she had given to me. I can't identify what exactly it is, but I down it anyway. Any alcohol will work right now.

What I failed to realize is that I'm five foot tall and have only had alcohol about eight times before this. Not to mention, I'm severely underweight.

I'm the ultimate lightweight. Within a few drinks, I'm pretty drunk.

"Hey Belle." A clearly sober Zack walks up to me, slinging his arm over my shoulder. "Having fun?"

"So much fun!" I shout, turning and going to get another drink.

After downing another drink and a few shots of tequila, I need a bathroom. I've never been to Christian's apartment so I just wander around until I find it.

I stumble into what looks to be a guest bedroom, sighing. How long does it take to find a damn toilet in this place?

I whip around to leave, and find Andrew in the doorway. "Andrew? What are you doing here?" I stutter out, wrapping my arms around myself.

"I came to find you." He smirks, slamming the door shut and locking it behind him.

"W-What are you doing, Andrew?" I snap, my body starting to shake.

In one swift motion, he pushes me down on the bed. I scream, but there's no chance anyone could hear me over the music and the chatting.

"Shut up." This prompts him to put his hand over my mouth as he starts to unbuckle my belt.

I'm screaming and thrashing around, but his hold is ultimately too strong to get out of. Tears are streaming down my cheeks as he tugs down my jeans and underwear, then reaching for his own belt.

There's some things in life that are worth fighting against. But there's a flip side too. Some things are just to pointless to fight against.

I stop fighting against Andrew. I let my body go slack and try to zone out. Sure, I could I never actually zone out because I'm in so much pain, but I do my best.

I'm left a crying mess on the bed at the end of the bed.

Things always seem to go from bad to worse, don't they?