When We Were Young (A Jensen Ackles Fanfiction)

15. Help, I Have Done It Again

Spotify Story Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/1253372708/playlist/3m0QNm1QPmpL0ejW0vIUxJ

When We Were Young

15. Help, I Have Done It Again

The scare followed everyone in the school around for the weeks following. Eyes were out windows and everyone seemed rattled and scared in general.

I was no exception. Adrenaline and nerves had gotten me through the first few days but Jensen noticed the jumpiness in me. Every loud noise and every change of weather had me on edge. He tried to be with me as much as he could but we had no classes together, it was near impossible.

But I was coping, mostly. To take my mind off it I had immersed myself in all things West Side Story. Opening night was only days away so it was a welcomed distraction. The closer the night came the more I found myself introverting. I could see it happening and I could see how much it worried Jensen.

He was watching me closely, and he was treating me with kid gloves. I knew he was doing it because he cared but it was suffocating.

I was going to snap, I knew it. I could feel it. And I was right. Two days from opening night and we had a full dress rehearsal. I was in the dressing room I was sharing with Kelly who was playing Anita. We were quiet, both touching up our makeup and I could see her watching me in the mirror. She could probably sense my nerves.

"Are you okay, Carmen?" She asked, turning in her seat to look at me.

I nodded without saying anything, continuing to pointlessly play with my hair. She got up, leaving the room and I let my arms fall to the table in front of me. I was losing it. My nerves were taking over. I hated being like this. I'd give my left arm to be normal. I rubbed my fingers against my temples, trying to remember how to breathe.

The air in the room changed and I felt him before I even looked up. "Did Kelly send for you?" I asked gently, lifting my head enough to see Jensen in the mirror.

He was leaning against Kelly's station, watching me carefully, dressed in his blue shirt, pants and apron, his hair styled to the side. My Tony. Stage ready. "She was worried."

I rolled my eyes so hard it hurt my brain. "I don't need to be monitored I'm fine." I got up, crossing the room to the hanger, grabbing my satin dressing gown I was meant to wear for my first scene at the dress shop.

Jensen came over, trying to grab the garment from my hands but I snatched it back, pulling it hard against my chest.

"I can dress myself thank you." He flinched at my words, trying to hide his hurt but I could see it in his body language, the way his shoulders fell in defeat.

"I know you're stressed, Carmen. I'm just trying to help." Jensen stepped back, putting his hands into his pockets like if he didn't he would have reached out for me. A part of me wanted him to reach out for me. But that side of me was missing.

I put my dressing gown on, tying it shut before moving back to my station, sitting down again. I could feel my hands shaking and I clasped them together on the hard surface in front of me. I needed to get a handle on my nerves or I wouldn't even make it onto the stage.

"Baby..." He sighed behind me, placing his hands on my shoulders and I looked up at him, shaking his hands off me and he stepped back, holding his hands up. "...hey. Calm down."

I stood up, pushing past him, leaving the room, heading towards the toilets.

"Where are you going?" Jensen was following me again and I turned on him. He almost ran into me that's how quickly I stopped.