When We Were Young (A Jensen Ackles Fanfiction)

13. Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas

I scoffed, shifting forward on Jensens bed. "Yeah, you. That would be great. But I don't know your family. All of your family. Besides, I like my Christmas. Christmas for 4. Not Christmas for 400."

"My family's not that big, Carmen. Besides, they'll love you."

"What? Until I have a panic attack in the bathroom because your aunts are asking me a million questions all at once? Or until I can't speak because a sea of your family are watching me and smiling at me like I'm something new and exciting. I just want a quiet Christmas where I don't have to think about how messed up I am for once."

"You're not messed up, Carmen. You'll have fun, I promise." He reached out for me and I pushed his hand away. "Carmen? Please don't be mad about this. It's Christmas."

I frowned at him shoving my books in my bag, standing up. "You should have asked me. You should have thought about me and how this would sound? Whatever makes Jensen happy Jensen gets right?"

Jensen stood up as well, crossing his arms in front of him. "That's not fair. I did this for you!"

"For me?" I stood closer to him, looking up into his determined green eyes that were narrowed back at me. "You didn't do this for me." I poked my finger into his chest. "You did this for you. I have to go."

I left his room and his house, I didn't even say goodbye to his family which I never did. I had dinner with my family who were all buzzing about Christmas day with the Ackles. I couldn't very well ruin their Christmas as well.

I went to bed but I couldn't sleep. I hadn't argued with Jensen for weeks. And it was Christmas. I pulled my coat on over my Christmas themed pyjamas, slid my feet into my converse and snuck out my balcony doors, sliding down the trellis and I ran the 3 blocks I knew like the back of my hand.

I snuck across the Ackles front yard and over to the trellis underneath Jensens window. I was getting pretty good at climbing things. I made my way up, pushing open the window, glad he hadn't locked it. I climbed in head first, catching myself with my hands on the floor before I face planted.

I looked around the dark room, seeing his body in his bed, a light snore coming from his sleeping form. Of course he can sleep. I smiled at the fact he didn't over think things like I did and I crept towards his bed. My perfect balance. I shed my shoes and jacket on the floor and I moved up beside him, tucking myself under the covers with him.

He stirred when I slid my hand through his hair and down the side of his neck. He shifted, his hand meeting my hip. His eyes blinked open as I ran my hand up his neck again. He looked wide eyed at me, gripping my hip tighter.

"Carmen? Are you okay? What-what are you doing here?" His eyes ran down my body, and he wrapped his hands around my waist, pulling me up against his body and I could feel how excited he was to see me through our pyjamas.

"Woah, hey." I pushed myself against his chest and he shut his eyes, stilling me against him.

"I'm sorry. Just, don't move for a second. I just need a minute." He kept his eyes closed and breathed slowly, and then he looked up at me, smiling apologetically. "Sorry. I was dreaming about you and then I woke up and here you are. I got away from myself."

I shook my head, my hand still rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm sorry. I didn't even think. I couldn't sleep because of what happened earlier and I wanted to apologize for being stupid so I kinda climbed up your trellis and fell in your window and-" I was cut off by his lips firmly pressed to mine. I softened against him, kissing him back.

He tasted like toothpaste and smelt like sweat and sleep. I moved up his body, straddling myself over him and he gasped into my mouth, his hands moving from my waist to my hips. I slid my tongue across his bottom lip and he let me in, groaning into my mouth.