The Look Of Knowledge

45. Je T'aime

Julian

We found out we were being recorded all along, we must have accidentally pressed something before we got into the echo chamber.

"Is this a modern Je T'aime Moi Non Plus by Serge Gainsbourg & Jane Birkin?" I ask as we play back the recording.

"Definitely" she says tying up her shoelaces. I gotta say, it embarrasses me a bit to listen to it, but she seems completely nonchalant about it. I stop it anyway. "You should use it though. Like the base for a song or something, judging by the stuff you have in here it looks like you're making some weird ass music huh?" She stands up and fixes her hair into a ponytail letting two locks of overgrown bangs fall on her face.

"You could say that, yes" I chuckle and stand up from the stool I was sitting on. She walks towards me with flirty eyes.

"Are you gonna let me listen to it?" She tries to persuade me by sliding her arms up my shoulders and meeting behind my neck.

"If you're good enough. You wanna go again?" I start but am interrupted by the door swinging open. Beardo bursts in wearing a sailor hat and holding a bunch of shit under his arm.

"Man! You don't even know what just happened!" He says dropping his stuff on the couch and walking towards us. "So I was at this thrift shop and it had the coolest things, like it's not just clothes, it has anything you could imagine. From Bob Squarepants figurines to samurai swords, I'm not kidding" he says wielding a sword from inside one of his bags. "Cool huh? So I got us a bunch of VHS movies from like the late 70's/early 80's and I went to the cashier and it's like a huge fat Hawaiian dude wearing a Goldie Hawn t-shirt and he's got a manbun. It was so bizarre.. anyways he goes.. 'you remind me of my brother Killa' and I was like 'I am your brother Killa' and then a single tear rolled down his cheek and I felt so bad! but then he smiled and said 'All the things are free' and handed me the bag with my shit and here I am poorless!"

"Are you being serious?" I ask digging into his bag and taking shit out. "Oh god, what are these things man? I feel like I'm opening one of those mystery boxes people sell on EBay at like a hundred bucks" I say opening a little box full of Pokémon cards.

"Well hello there, what's your name pretty?" I hear Beardo's voice babbling behind my back.

"Mika, nice to meet you. You are?" She replies politely even though I could tell she didn't like him the second he walked in. She's not too social. And Beardo is not too likeable the first time you meet him.

"Jeramy but you can call me Beardo. Do you like my sword?" I immediately turn around. I've seen him picking up chicks and honestly/sadly that's how he plays it. I like him though, but he's what some women would call... a 'douche'.

"Dude-" I step in ready to make my claim.

"It's kinda short for my taste" Mika cuts in nonchalantly. "Julian here's got an bigger one, don't you Jules?" She says and looks at me. I open my mouth but nothing comes out, I can only laugh at Beardo's confused expression trying to understand the situation.

"She's my girlfriend" I clarify snaking my hand around Mika's waist.

"Oh man! I'm so sorry man" he laughs taking his hat off. "I'm sorry" he says now looking at her.

"It's quite alright" She joins in.

"I thought you were like a new assistant or something of that sort. Now I understand why it smells like sex in here" Mika blushes and looks at me, honestly she doesn't blush that often and quite frankly it's very cute. I chuckle but make sure to stroke her waist to ease her.

"You know what they say..." I reply quickly thinking about a possible punch line "More sex, less turtlenecks" Mika's phone starts to ring in her purse and she excuses herself to pick it up.

"Dude we're not recording today, I texted you all in the groupchat" I tell Beardo.

"Oh I left the groupchat" he says. "Well, technically Amir kicked me out because I told Jacob nobody reads the things he sends us"

"Those are really interesting articles, man!"

"Nah, can you add me again?"

"I cannot do that sadly. I didn't even know if I actually sent the message but given the fact that nobody else showed up I'm guessing.. I did it right? But as far as virtual group management goes, I'm no fit to do that"

"Whatever Casagrandpa, can I stay and try some shit out?" Beardo asks.

"Yeah sure, we're leaving just now" I tell him grabbing my jacket. Mika comes back and informs me we must attend Albert's birthday lunch tomorrow and we gotta go buy him a gift. We say bye to Beardo and leave.

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sorry for taking a thousand years