We were in the car on to the way to the mental health place in the nearby town. Mark just wouldn't take no for an answer. We drove in silence and I looked out the window at the passing scenery. When we stopped at the traffic lights, I saw someone crossing the road with a Jacksepticeye shirt. Shit. I put my head down and just hoped for the best. I loved meeting fans and I loved them all but I was scared that he would make me lash out at them. He liked to cause hell in my life so why not make it hell for my fans. Mark reached his hand over and touched my leg.
"It's okay Jack. They love you" Thankfully, they didn't even give the car a second glance and we went ahead with no trouble.
I wish those fans had looked over to us. I could have made a right fool out of him. I caused his leg to twitch and Mark moved his hand away. Nobody could touch my Jack. He was mine and nobody else's now. Mark was worried and I could sense it. He thought he could help, it was funny. Getting Jack to eat was going to be like holding a conversation with an inanimate object.
"Jack?" Mark asked. I looked to him.
"Why?" He questioned.
"Why what?" I tried to act innocent because he couldn't find out the truth.
"Is this intentional? Like do you want to die?" Those words hit me particularly hard. It wasn't my fault. I just turned away and looked back out onto the passing streets.
"Jack, what brings you back here?" Dr Calais asked me, fiddling with her pen. I sat uncomfortably in the unevenly padded chair.
"Mark is worried about me"
"Are you worried about yourself?"
"Kinda..." I felt him pushing from inside. It felt like a burning all the way up my throat, like he was trying to rip me apart for talking.
"Can you explain?" She sorted out her notebook and got ready to write. There was a long silence before I felt like I could speak.
" Something happened... in an alley way and I've not felt the same since..." NO! My whole body jerked and I could see a look of concern spread across the doctors face.
"Jack?" She said calmly. I jumped up and screamed.
"No, no, no!" My voice was distorting. Whether it was all in my head or not, I didn't know but the voice that was screaming was not me.
