Restart My Life

25

THIS STORY IS GETTING REALLLLLLL DEEP. BUT 1, RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS IS FUNNN. 2, I THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE MORE INTERESTING THAN AN ENDLESS AMOUNT OF FILLERS.

"If I had to conjure up one life lesson that she would want me to carry for the rest of my life, it is this: Seek advice from others, but always trust myself. She believed in me, and she believed that I always knew what was best for me. Although this is a sad day, she would not want us to be sad and in honor of that I ask that we all enjoy today and celebrate the life that she had. Thank you." I found my way back to my seat with my brother and dad; who in which had already made their speeches. Blake was sitting behind me and I felt his hand on my shoulder. I smiled but didn't dare to turn around and expose the monster called leaked mascara. The minister finished off the ceremony and we all had a chance to go up to the coffin and say some final words. I approached it, holding Blake's hand, and placed a rose on top of the oak. It had always been her favorite flower. I patted the box and continued walking outside to the court yard. The whole of my family were there and they were all exchanging looks when I walked out. I peered around me and saw all of their eyes glued on me. I continued to walk through them and to the car; with Joe, Blake, dad and Matt.

Arriving back at the house was hard as all it did was remind me of her but I enjoyed it. We all got in the house and sat in the living room talking for a while. Dad poured himself a drink and little did we know that it wouldn't be his last. His way of mourning was drinking.

Dad was drunk, Matt and Joe were awkward and I was fed up.

"Dad. Stop." I muttered. But he took no notice and continued to drink. Joe and Matt soon left as Joe explained that he was going to spend the night at Matt's house and that he couldn't stand the smell of the alcohol. Which confused me seeing as not much more than a month ago, Joe was the one that'd get pissed all the time. I didn't want to stay at home but didn't want to leave dad alone so decided to stay, much to my disgust.

Joe, Matt and Blake all left, leaving me home alone with dad. It's never been just us two before so it felt quite strange. "Dad?" He sat in his armchair, staring at the floor. "Dad!" I raised my voice, His focus made it's way to me,

"What's wrong? What happened." He's become very skittish due to the alcohol and it's quite creepy.

"Do you want some tea? Coffee?" I asked, quietly. He nodded so I took a hazard guess of coffee as I'd never seen him drink tea in the past. The cup was steaming and I set it down beside him. 11:37pm. "I think you should start heading to bed," I remarked. He nodded again and while standing I noticed that he hadn't taken a single sip of his coffee. After standing up, he slouched back down into the arm chair and looked over at me, tears rolling down his face. I'd never seen him cry before, not even at the funeral. "Dad." I stepped over, giving him a hug, "It'll be okay, we'll get through this." He sniffed,

"I'm scared to sleep Riles, what if I don't wake up. Like her. I can't leave that on you and Joe." The thought of this made me start to cry slightly.

"That's not going to happen, I promise." I gave him a kiss on the head.

"I fucking miss her." He sniffed, "Silly cow didn't even give me any notice," He laughed. I laughed at this, tears still falling down my cheeks.

"We'll get through this dad."