Wait For It (Sequel to Challenge Accepted)

Chapter Twenty-One: I'll Protect You

"So, what did you think?" Barney asked. I sat on the couch, once again holding Ice to his eye. He had his arm slung over my legs, which were tucked beside me.

"Of what?"

"The fight?"

"I think you punched yourself in the face, and then punched Ted to make it look like you got in a fight." I replied. He looked at me. "Ted has a voice thing too. It's your tell."

"You really don't think I could get in a fight, do you?" He asked.

"I don't want you too, Barney! Marshall's right, you're adults. Adults don't act like that, or at least they shouldn't."

"You thought it was kinda hot though." He said, smirking at me. I shrugged.

"That doesn't change the fact that it was immature...and fake."

"So it's true."  I put the ice down.

"Maybe a little bit. Teeny tiny bit." I made a gesture with my fingers. He laughed.

"Ha! Mission accomplished."

"Shut up." I shoved him, standing up and walking to the kitchen, putting the ice in the sink. Barney wrapped his arms around my waist.

"You know I could protect you if it came down to it, right?" I nodded.

"Yeah. I know. Well, unless it's a guy like Doug."

"I could take Doug for you."

"The guy took out three guys by himself. I highly doubt that. But I'll admit, I feel a lot safer when you're around than I would otherwise."

"Did I mention that you look hot wearing my jacket?" He asked. I smiled, putting my hands on his chest and kissing him.

"I guess we're both hot then." He chuckled.

~~~

It was all fine and good...until I got this call.

"Ted and I are being sued for assault."

"But you didn't assault anyone."

"Yeah, well they don't know that. Can you and Marshall look over the forms?"

"Yeah. I'll meet you at Ted's."

~~~

"Assault! They're suing us for Assault!" Ted exclaimed.

"Ok, what's the penalty for assault? What, do I have to pay a fine? Pick up trash on the highway? 'Cause I've done that before, know what I mean?" I punched him in the stomach, causing him to double over.

"I'll aim lower next time." I warned. Marshall and I shared a look and started a telepathic conversation.

What do you say, play them around a little bit?

The certainly deserve it. Maybe they'll learn their lesson.

I wont say anything if you won't.

"I don't know," Marshall replied, "I mean, you guys could me booking at some serious prison time. "

"Prison!"

"I can't go to prison! I mean, I could get a lot of reading done, finally write some short stories. Work out all the time. Seriously, if I don't come out of there completely ripped-"

"Ted, we can't go to prison. People get shivved in the joint." Barney told him.

"That's what Marshall was trying to tell you. If it's younger guys, it's just stupid guys, but adults get sued. Maybe you should've listened to him."