Lauren has changed. After six weeks in San Diego California, she has come back with short hair, a new tan, and a hard distancing shell that will be almost impossible to crack. She has put up her walls and may never let anyone in again.
Will Barney g...
"It's funny looking back on it now. I was so sure Stella was the one. And when she left me, I was so devastated. But you guys got me through it, and now the painful part's over. I've come out the other side a little bit stronger. You know, I hardly even think about her anymore. That's what time does, I guess."
"Dude, the wedding was yesterday." I told him.
"I know. And this is me moving on. A great new chapter of my life began today, and we're gonna celebrate. Right now, right now we need two things. We need Kool and we need the Gang. It's jukebox time, huh?" He clapped, standing up and walking over to the Jukebox.
"I can't tell if he's in pain or if he's legitamently ok." I pointed out.
"I look at that young man, popping and locking his way over to the jukebox and I think to myself...'You know, maybe Stella made the right call'." Lily and I shared a look before punching him in each arm. "Ow, pain."
"Love hurts. Get over it."
"How is he dancing right now?! he should be smashing up Stella's car with a sledgehammer."
"I'll do it."
"No!" They all told me.
"Hypothetical: Ted isn't pretending to be happy. Ted really is happy." Barney said. "He didn't want to get married in the first place. Ted just pulled off the greatest train dodge since Stand by Me. Well, not the first kid, but the other kids."
"No, he is in bad shape."
"What's up?" Ted asked, dancing by our table to the bar.
"Really bad shape. And we need to be there for him."
"He doesn't look like he needs us to be there for him. When Michael and I broke up, I can assure you, I looked nothing like the dancing fool ordering a beer over there." I told them. "I think he's genuinely ok."
"Thus, the biggest train dodge-"
"You wanted to propose to me yesterday, so can it buddy."
"Ooh." Everyone laughed.
"Low blow, Lauren. Low blow." I kissed his jaw. "Forgiven."
"That's what I thought."
~~~
I went back to Barney's place and changed into my pajamas, leaning over the counter on my elbows in the kitchen, eating chips and reading a book.
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I felt a pair of hands grab my hips and I stood up straight, my back hitting Barney's chest. He squeezed my hips and I jumped.
"I like those." He told me quietly, his lips moving against my ear.
"Chips? I know. They're my go-to comfort food." I told him.
"You know what I meant." I turned around to face him, moving my bowl and my book and sitting on the counter. He moved closer to me, his hands on the counter on either side of me.
"Do I know that?"
"Can you not just accept that I want you to know how hot you are?" He asked.
"Barney...I already know." He rolled his eyes, leaning foreword and kissing me. I put a hand on his face, kissing him back slowly. He pulled away, moving to the side of my mouth, and then my jaw, and then my neck. His hands found my waist, and I brought one hand up into his hair, bringing his mouth back to mine. I pulled away, leaning my forehead against his and pressing another brief kiss to his lips.
~~~
"Hey, you guys wanna get some dinner?" Ted asked.
"OH, shut up." We all looked at Lily in shock. "I'm sorry sweetie. It's just, Ted, you've been through something traumatic, and we're trying to be there for you as friends, but you're not letting us and it's ticking us off you selfish slut. Sorry."
"Look, we're just worried that you're not dealing with this whole Stella thing." Marshall told him. "Ok, now, do you remember when Lily left me? You remember how I held in my feelings?"
"Yeah, dude, you were a rock." Robin said sarcastically.
"Well, I should have been even worse, ok? I should have gotten mad. I should have taken your advice and set all of Lily's stuff on fire."
"Oh, nice. Thanks Ted." He shrugged.
"But I didn't, and I think that that's why it took me so long to get better. So now, Ted? I want you to explode. Release the berserker. Ok? you ready? Now!"
"I'm good." Ted said, taking a sip of his beer.
"No!"
"Guys, get off his back. Listen, if Ted were married right now, He'd be married, he'd be living in New Jersey, and he'd be married." I opened my mouth to speak, but he covered it with his hand. "He's fine. Now, let's eat. How about Flat Michael's?"
"No, that's 44th and Lex. Can't do it."
"Why not?" Robin asked.
"It's too close to Stella's gym. Might run into her. Anywhere else, though."
"Ok, um...how 'bout Hurley's?"
"Ooh."
"Right between Stella's office and her dry cleaners. No sir."
"Well, what about Meatloaf Charlie's?"
"Two blocks from Stella's mother's hairdressers."
"Anywhere else, huh?" I asked.
"Is there anywhere in Manhattan we can go to dinner?" Barney questioned.
"Of course. Check this out." He pulled out a map of Manhattan, a bunch of stuff covered in red.
"A little reference map I made for myself. A New York guide to places you might run into Stella Zinman. Red areas are places to avoid, white areas are safe. Blue is water."
"That is just ridiculous." Lily said.
"Well, water is blue."
"I say, let us run into Stella. I've got a thing or two I'd like to say anyway." I told him. Barney grabbed my hand under the table.
"You can't live that way."
"She leaves you at the alter and you're the one avoiding her?" Marshall asked.
"Yes, I'm avoiding her, what's the big deal? That's how we do it."
"Who's we? Gutless weenies?"
"No, 'We' is people from the great state of Ohio. When life gives us pain, we Buckeyes take that pain and we push it down. And if the pain starts to come up again, we push more pain down on top of it. Why confront something when you can avoid it, right?"
"No." I told him.
"Ooh, someone just told me about a Tapas place that's in the white zone." Lily said.
