Wait For It (Sequel to Challenge Accepted)

Chapter Eighteen: The Last Page

I sat in Marshall's office the next day, just kind of hanging out, when Mr. Bilson walked by.

"Bilson." Marshall called.

"Yeah?"

"Hey. Look, I just wanna say, I know you guys went with Sven, but Ted Mosby is tremendously talented, and I think he would have done a heck of a job."

"I agree. That's why I voted for him." He left.

"I knew it! Barney was lying yesterday!" I exclaimed.

"How did you know?" He asked.

"He does a voice thing. Conference call?"

"Conference call." We walked out into the hallway and too the boardroom. Marshall was ticked, and quite frankly, so was I. "Conference call, now." He came out of the board room.

"I knew you were lying yesterday." I told him.

"Is that what that look was for?" I nodded and we walked out onto the roof.

"You got somethin' you wanna tell us?" Marshall asked. "Bilson told me he wanted to give the job to Ted, so what happened!"

"Ok, fine, I chose the other building."

"What the heck is the matter with you?! This is Ted's big break, and you sold him out because you wanted to work in the brain of a Tyrannosaurus rex, which incidentally, if you knew anything about dinosaurs, is really, really small!"

"Marshall this isnt' about my office. Ted's building was good. Sven's was better."

"For a seven year old!" I told him. "It wasn't practical!

"How could you do this to Ted, after everything he's been through with Stella! You're just being selfish."

"Marshall, I would never make a business decision for selfish reasons."

"Your voice is doing the thing." I told him.

"I am a professional. Now come on, let's get a nice daytime drunk going and throw empties at pigeons."

"No, for two reasons, one: Pigeons are smarter than you think, and two this is our last conference call. There are repercussions for betraying your friends."

"Like what?"

"Like this." He took the fire extinguisher out of the door, leaving Barney and I alone, locked on the roof.

"Marshall!" I yelled, banging on the door. "Why did he leave me out here!?"

"Because he wanted to punish me." Barney said, leaning against the edge of the building.

"So being alone with me is your punishment now?" I asked.

"No...ruining my plan is my punishment."

"What plan? Barney what are you talking about?"

"The Lauren." he said. I raised my eyebrows. "The last play in the playbook. My last play."

"I knew something weird was going on!" He sighed. "Answer me this, Barney, why would you try to use a play on me!? You already had me."

"It wasn't a play to get you," He replied, "The play was my proposal." I raised my eyebrows.

"So you were going to ask me to marry you, by making me break up with you?! Barney that's stupid!"

"Just hear me out." He said. He took out his phone, opening up a document. "Step One: Admit to yourself that you are irretrievably in love with this girl, and swallow all of your fear of commitment. Step Two: Agree that marriage isn't the right idea for you two, locking the door at any future of getting married. Step three: Lauren suggests a break to figure out what we want."

"How did you plan that?!" I asked.

"Because I know you...and I knew exactly what you were going to do. But you'll be more mad at me for this one. Step Four: Choose the wrong moment to make a drunken move and get shot down on purpose. Step Five: Admit to her you've given up on her, making it clear that you'll never get back together.  Step six: When Lauren suspects something weird is going on, she'll inevitably break into your house and try and find the playbook, which you'll monitor via the hidden cameras you have in your apartment."

"I was just planning to do that one." I realized. "You manipulative-"

"Step seven: You'll come home, take out the playbook and burn it right in front of her...and actually burn it. You don't need it anymore." I stopped, continuing to listen. "Step Eight: Because your friends have no boundaries, they'll inevitably have an intervention for Lauren which you'll monitor via the hidden cameras you have in Lily and Marshall's apartment.Step Nine: Find the person that annoys Lauren more than anything in the world and ask for her help."

"You don't know who-"

"Krista McCarthy, she was in your class at Law school, she was your competition, you beat her, she hated you for it, therefore you returned the favor by hating her back." I raised my eyebrows. "Your mother sometimes talks too much."  I sighed. "Step Ten: Pretend to be dating Krista. Step eleven: Get Lauren to tell the group the backstory, so everyone knows how much and why she hates this girl. Step twelve: Tell only Ted of your first date with Krista.  Step Thirteen: Wait until Ted tells Lauren. Step Fourteen: Wait until Lauren arrives at her favorite spot in the city, and finds the secret, final page of the playbook. The last play you'll ever run.. Step Fifteen: Hope she says yes." I walked over to the edge of the building, looking over the city and thinking about this.

"You put in all of that work, and all of that planning...for some stupid proposal?" I asked.

"I didn't think it was stupid. I thought you'd love it-"

"I love you." I corrected him. "I don't care about some elaborate proposal plan, I just want you."

"Ok...so, just to clarify...if I asked you to marry me, Right here, right now...you would say yes?" He asked. He got down on one knee, pulling the ring box out and opening it. I placed my hands over his, looking down at him...and then I closed the box.

"No."

"No?" He asked. I shook my head.

"No. First, you're gonna go fix this thing with Ted. Second...you're gonna try this whole proposal thing again. No big elaborate scheme, no staged break-ups. Just you."

"What does that even mean?" He asked. I pulled him to his feet, putting my hands on his face.

"If you know me as well as you seem to think you do," I told him, "You'll figure it out." I pressed my lips briefly to his before banging on the door. Marshall opened it, letting us in."Thank you, Marshall. "