him // c.a.d

chapter 11 - sushi babe

"Yes." I say, and continue organizing all my school supplies in my backpack, the order I preferred, biggest to smallest.

I had a cloudy head. I had many thoughts floating around, so many.

I couldn't help but feel somewhat bad, for how I treated Cameron. I'm not use to acting that way with him - it just sort of feels like if I was being so rude. I don't know, I just felt bad, for how I acted with him.

"What are you thinking about?" Delilah asks me, as she takes a sip of her sweet tea.

"I'm thinking," I pause and fix my napkin. "Maybe, I was a little too harsh with him." I finish, placing a sushi in between my lips and into my mouth.

She shook her head, cleaning her mouth with a napkin. "You weren't harsh at all. He deserves it, anyways. How does he expect you to feel? He stopped talking to you, for two weeks. He literally threw you away and now all of a sudden he thinks he can just crawl back into your life."

Delilah was completely right. I shouldn't feel bad, not one bit.

I know I just say that, for now. The next thing I know. I'll fall again. I know I will. I can't resist him. It feels like no matter what he does, if he hurts me. I'll just always feel something for him. I can't forget him, it's not that easy  - like how I think it is.

"Lets go back to the hell hole we are forced to attend before you sit there for hours - thinking." She smiles, stretching her small arm out. I take her hand and get up, following her to the door.

"Where are you two going without my hug?" She yells from the kitchen. All her costumers looked at her, strangely, since she rarely left the kitchen.

Delilah and I, looked at each other and smiled, as we made our way to her open arms, hugging her tightly. 

This lady was Mrs. Patterson. Delilah and I, completely adored her. We see her like our grandmother. She has worked at Bonqui for mostly her whole life, taking over after her father died, at a young age of just sixteen, with the help of her mother of course.

She is a very caring woman and I look up to her. Her hair is pearly white, so bouncy and beautiful. Mrs. Patterson always had on her signature red lipstick - that mixed perfectly with her bright, blue eyes she had.

"Now you girls - run off before you're late to school." She starts playfully smacking us with the glove she had taken off.

We laugh and hurry out of the restaurant.

"She is so adorable," Delilah states, looking for her car, in the parking lot. "Each time she hugs you, it's like her scent carries on with you, the whole entire day, it's insane."

Mrs. Patterson or how I like to call her, Mrs. Patty, has always had a smell of hazelnuts mixed with rich vanilla beans. To me, she smelt delicious. I know, strange way to put it.

___

I always try to not think negatively. I have delt with depression, not severe. But it was a low point in my life, that took me quite awhile to overcome. I always try to think positively and surround myself with positive people.

But I can't help but feel alone and when I feel this way, I always think negative - which I try to also control, but sometimes it gets the best of me.