Say Something 【boyxboy】√Completed

Chapter 29

We don't hang out as much as usual after school during the following week. Ross says he's busy with school work but I know he has an easy senior year, and he could always just come over and study at my place.

I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Maybe dating was easy because we were already great friends, but now would it be considered clingy if I asked for more of his time? His attention?

I don't even need attention. I just need to be near him. His unusual behavior makes me worry and I find it harder to focus in class.

Even just doing daily tasks seems more difficult because I have a constant anxious feeling that won't go away. I thought I'd gotten better at controlling it, but I guess not. It bothers me that I've become so dependent on Ross to calm me down and keep me company.

While running an errand in town, I hear my name. I jump slightly, hoping it's not anyone I'd like to avoid.

I turn and see Nadine and Evynne walking over to me as I pick out some snacks at the general store. "Oh, hey." I relax a little, glad it's just them.

"What's up?" Nadine asks casually, leaning over to see what I'm doing.

"Uh..." I shrug. "Just, um, getting food."

"Us too. We're having a girls night."

They both smile at me but something seems off.

"You okay?" asks Evynne. I was about to ask her the same thing.

I raise a brow. "Yeah, I'm okay. Why?"

She shrugs. "I've just noticed you and Ross are kinda-" Evynne pauses as Nadine nudges her. Did she think I wouldn't notice that?

My chest feels tight. How am I supposed to ask them what's going on? I look between the two of them and frown. "What?"

"Nothing," says Nadine quickly.

"He's been weird, I know."

"He's just stressed." Evynne shrugs. "Senior stuff. College... and all that. I just wanted to make sure you guys are good."

"Yeah, everything's fine with us." I try to smile but it isn't sincere at all. Why would they ask me about him if they already know he's busy and stressed out?

I text Ross on my way home, feeling uneasy.

How are you?

Good. What are you up to?

Out for a walk. Do you want to hang out?

I can't right now. Sorry.

I sigh to myself. Maybe I am being too clingy... but Ross is really important to me.

Is everything okay?

He doesn't respond right away but eventually his text comes as I'm unlocking the door to the apartment.

I don't know, honestly.

I read over the short message a few times. This is the first time he hasn't just brushed it off. Another text arrives.

We should probably talk.

What does that mean? As much as I want Ross to open up to me, I can't help but have a sinking feeling in my stomach.

A serious talk, it seems.

What if it's not about him, but us? What if I'm doing something wrong? My hear starts to race as the possibilities fill my mind.

I want to ask someone what to do, but I don't think I could even ask Gareth.

My phone chimes as I'm finishing my dinner, which I forced myself to eat because I gradually lost my appetite thinking about everything. It's another text from Ross.

I'm free now. Do you want to meet somewhere?

A half hour later, I meet my boyfriend on the community center balcony. We haven't been up here in ages, but the view is still just as beautiful and it's quiet.

"Hey." Ross is leaning on the railing and looking out at the fields. He smiles half-heartedly. I desperately want to ask what's wrong.

"Hey," I echo, walking towards him. "So, um... what did you want to talk about?"

Ross sighs. "Us, I guess."

I frown. He doesn't look frustrated, he just looks sad. "What about us?" I ask carefully.

He's quiet for a long moment. Eventually I reach for his hand. "You can tell me." He crosses his arms and my hand grasps at the air where his hand just was. My heart pounds as it sinks in. "Oh," I breathe. "Wait, are you... do you not... like me anymore?" I ask, barely getting the words out as I realize what's happening.

Oh, no. That's why he's been so distant.

Ross's eyes widen. "No, Jude-"

"What did I do?" I ask, my chest feeling tight.

"It's not you, I swear. Of course I still like you!" Ross moves towards me and hugs me tightly.

I relax against him, so relieved I could almost cry. I was so scared for a few seconds.

"I'm sorry I've been acting strange," he says softly. "I've had so much to think about. I just... I feel awful."

"Why?" I ask, sounding more desperate than I'd intended. "Tell me what's going on. You can tell me anything."

Ross pulls away from me but smiles just a little. "I know that, but it's difficult. I'd love for everything to just go away, but I can't keep it from you anymore."

"What are you talking about?" I ask.

He avoids eye contact and opens his mouth to speak, but it takes him a minute to gather his thoughts. "Jude..." His voice is shaking.

I narrow my eyes in concern.

He crosses his arms again, looking nervous.

"What I'm going to say... it'll hurt you."

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Author's Note : Cliffhanger! The next chapter will be a continuation of this scene. I don't have a lot to say about this chapter, but I will say that a lot will be revealed in the next update. Please vote if you enjoyed reading it and comment with your thoughts! I have loved reading your predictions so far. I'm also still taking questions for my Q & A. Are you glad Ross is finally opening up to Jude? Should Jude talk to Gareth more? What do you think of the other characters, like Nadine and Evynne?
- Shiloh