chapter-8

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"Sometimes pain is more deeper than the love"













































Moon was calming as always it was providing that peacefulness which was lacking in my mind. As I Sat in my balcony with a cup of coffee in my hands and ear pressed against my phone trying to focus my attention on the song which Vansh was playing on his laptop while working. It has been half an hour since he called me but he hasn't talked he just told me to stay on the line and listen to the song while he works and that's what I am doing. The problem was my attention was shifting from time to time and I wasn't able to concentrate on the song. I so badly wanted to talk to him that the song and that silence was suffocating me.

"How much work is left to do?" I asked him in the hope that he gets the message that I need to talk to him.

"Maybe it will take more than one hour" he replied without bothering about my begging tone.

"Vansh I really need to talk to you. Don't you get it, it has been so long since we properly talked" finally I told him clearly without worrying about him getting annoyed or pissed. Afterall that's what they say ask clearly what you want and that's what I am doing.

"Sanaya don't you understand I have work to do. If you have so much problem with me working just tell me and I will quit the job and than I will have lot and lot of time for you" he told me in an annoyed tone.

The reply from him made my heart hurt. That's the thing he always tells whenever I would complain about him not giving me time. The point is I have never asked him to quit the job and it was my stubbornness that made him look for a job at the first point and still he don't understand the simple fact that I just want a little time in his busy schedule and I have never said to quit the job.

"Why you always get so pissed whenever I ask for a little time? I am just saying that talk to me for 5 minutes without any disturbance and than you can complete your work" I almost cried in the end.

"For God sake Sanaya will you stop crying like a child there is nothing to cry about. I don't get it why you have to always cry" he answered harshly ingnoring my question.

Wiping my tears I answered him " I am not crying for a little thing it is hurting me and that's why I am crying. Don't you understand my feelings?"

"I don't know whats wrong with you so you better put everything together and call me when you are done with this drama" saying this he ended the call making me cry even harder.

I looked at the moon and cried even harder. I so badly wanted to wipe my tears away and tell myself that there is no need for crying for the person who doesn't value your tears but the pain was so extreme that how hard I tried to stop my tears they fell with more force. This is the thing which makes me question everything and most importantly his love for me. What I don't understand is that how can he hang up on me while I am crying. He was the one who use to tell me that he hates to see my cry and will never make me cry and will never give up on me but something has changed or should I say that everything has changed.

His behaviour cause that turmoil in me which makes me queation my own self and my love for him. I wonder what I did wrong is my love not enough and good that he has to make me feel like crap. I looked at my phone and it has been fifteen minutes since he ended the call and has not even bothered to call me again to check if I am ok or not and above that what hurts the most is that he considers my pain and tears as a drama.

Ignoring the pain I dialed his number and waited for him to answer it. After four ring the call was answered.

"I am sorry I shouldn't have acted childish and I should have understood that you are busy with your work" I told him knowing that he would never apologize and if I don't end it here than it will go on and on.

"You need to understand and behave like a grown up and there is no need for causing any more drama than already exist. Now go to sleep. I love you" came his reply without any hesitation.

"I love you too" with that I ended the call and sat there staring at the phone.

This is the problem he always wants to dominate and have his ways without caring about my feelings and emotions. This wasn't the first time that he has considered my crying as drama. It is something for which I am getting used to and deep down I know how much I try or how much love I give I can never change the person he is. There are always excuses for his mistakes and if I make a mistake he makes me feel as if I have committed a huge crime and at the end its me who has to apologize. Getting up I walked to my room to try to get some sleep accepting the truth that people change and so does this thing called love.
















































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