//5//Maybe, Just Maybe

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*****this is a picture of some flowers from Walmart inside of Walmart :) taken by yours truly******

Okay yay they're finally older now celebrate!!!

This is going to be POV chapter.

Age 17/18
Theodosia's POV

Finally. Out of that empty house called "home". I can't believe it's over. Elementary school, middle school, high school. Finished. Now, onward to more struggling years as a student.

No more of that foolish stuff that I honestly would rather skip, if I could. Just kidding. There's at least another four years of it.

But no, society decides that they want to tell people what to learn, when to learn, and what to do with what you have learned.

Yet, nobody seems to relate to these emotions that I have against society.

My earliest memory of a messed up society was when I was eleven years old.

Society told my mom that she couldn't survive unless she paid thousands of dollars for treatment that might not work.

Society told me that to bury my mom, we would have to pay thousands of dollars for her to rest peacefully.

Am I the only one that does not oblige to this situation? Apparently.

Now, my mom is cold, six feet under, her body filled with a treatment for stomach cancer that never fucking worked.

Thanks a lot, society.

I'm finally done with the wretched people that I had to pretend that I liked. I wish. Now I have to fake like even more people.

There was only one person that I trusted. And I had left him in sixth grade. Philip Hamilton. I'm still trying to figure out how I ever trusted someone.

I cried for weeks after we left, away from New York City. I was lost, confused and angry. It hurt like hell.

I wondered how he felt. I just left. Never saying goodbye. I'm sorry, Philip. Leaving my only friend was... almost unbearable. But, hey? I did it, right?

Why am I thinking about him? It's been...what? Seven years?

I thought about him sometimes. I heard that he still lives in New York.

I'm going to college in New York. But chances are that I'll never see my long lost best friend again. I still haven't gotten over the fact that I actually had a best friend.

Hmm... maybe I was pretty cool back in the day.

But even if I did see him, who knows what I would say? Probably pretend like I never even saw him.

Definitely not start a conversation with him. I'm not exactly the most eloquently speaking person.

I almost became mute after my mother died. That was six years ago. But I never really got back to doing theatre again because of it.

I've met friends since then. I think. I got even more socially awkward as the years went on.

And my dad definitely noticed that my social skills were... how do you say? Terrible.

I guess the apple does fall far from the tree. Sure my dad is quiet, but he is quite the speaker.

I used to love how people thought that I was going to be the next Einstein. Well, there's been a slight change of plans. That plan was shot down on the first day of high school when I fell asleep during class.

Hey guys, it's me. The biggest disappointment you know.

When I was younger, everyone was so impressed that I skipped second grade. It was unheard of.

People wanted to be friends with me, have sleepovers with me, be in classes with me...

But that was all Philip's doing. He made other people want to hang out with me. That also shows how freaking socially awkward I am.

He made me seem like the best thing in the world. He thought that I was the best thing in the world.

Damn, that must've been pretty fantastic.

Philip's POV

I'm living up to my dad's expectations. I'm working harder than I ever have.

And he has never been prouder. He was even prouder than when my best friend "broke up" with me and I kept a straight face.

I hated her for that. For just leaving. No final statements, except the words written in her letter. It wasn't even well written. But it had some valuable parts.

I still have the letter. That sounds hella creepy but I kept it because I've always wanted to run into her again. Not that she was hard to find.

My dad and her dad always made arrangements to insult the other. I could've easily joined him, and seen Theodosia again.

But she never came. She managed to break my heart before I knew that hearts could break.

I shouldn't blame everything on a lanky ten year old girl at the time, but here I am. She meant so much to me.

But I barely remember her.

Of course I remember her name, her birthday, her favorite color.... but I don't remember the more personal things like how old she was when she first started theatre.

I recall when I was younger that I had nightmares of her leaving. They were combined with the nightmares she was having all of those years ago, the day of her birthday.

Those nightmares were the worst.

I admit: I miss having someone who completely understood me. Who wasn't afraid to offend my father or step outside of the safe zone. Even I usually wasn't that bold. But she was.

Even though she was one of the quietest people I knew, her actions spoke for her.

Like whenever she would hug me tightly, or punch me playfully, or jump up and down and up and down until she was rolling on the floor with laughter.

Her actions showed her emotions.

Like when she gave me a kiss on the cheek when we were eight, five days after her birthday. It was a dare. But I know she would've done it anyway.

Ok, so maybe I do remember the more personal things.

I heard that she was back in New York for college.

Would she even remember me? Who knows, she'll probably get a Nobel Peace prize by the time we meet again.

She was the closest friend that I'd ever had and no one could ever in a million years replace that.

That little girl made the little me feel so many emotions at the same time. I just need to know more about...

Maybe I could find her. Maybe, just maybe.

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Idek where this is going yup im trash :)) um sooo y'all should comment that would be cool holy crap im tired gn

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