I Didn't Mean It (Doctor Who)

Ch.21: The End

A/N: Hi guys! So this is the last chapter of I Didn't Mean It! I just wanted to say thank you for everything you guys have done. I never thought I would get up to this many reads and get this much support on my crappy writing, and it means a lot that you guys have given it to me. I wanted to give a super special thanks to the following users for all their support and love and comments, @abnormalgail, @rainbowcandy100, @ElectricFantasy, @maryn11, @RomioneGirl, @cayleedavis,

And of course my amazing best friend in the entire world @lost_in_the_TARDIS. I love you all and hope you enjoy my final chapter!

~o0o~

The white light dimished around me, leaving me on a familiar asphault road. I spotted the TARDIS landing in the distance, it's faint blue light flashing conspicuously. I ran behind a nearby house to hide as the Doctor strolled out, my younger self following him. I looked pale as a sheet of paper, and I knew exactly why. This had been when we visited my old home. I waited for them to pass by, and sprinted as silently as possible across the road, diving into my old backyard.

I couldn't help smiling to myself at the realization that I was in three different places at once, at three different ages.

"Time travel. Ha," I muttered to myself, feeling a strange sense of accomplishment.

The feeling quickly faded as I heard a Dalek's high-pitched, robotic voice shriek from nearby.

This was my chance. I had to see what really went on this night.

I glimpsed a trail of Daleks entering my house, one of them balancing a horrifyingly familiar object between its plunger and whisk arms.

The bomb.

They knew this was going to happen all along, that they placed the bomb in my house to kill my parents so that I would be on that roof when the Doctor got his coordinates wrong. They knew all this pain was going to happen to me. I felt rage course through me, and I stifled my urge to run out and attack them. I ran for cover as the explosion went off, yellow/orange light blinding me. I felt the time begin to pound away in my head.

6...5...4...3...2...

Wait! I thought, I need to know more!

I was barely able to glimpse on of the Daleks planting something in my unconscious past self's arm before the light surrounded me, taking me away. I found myself lying with my cheek pressed against dirt, the sound of wheezing echoing through the silent air. I got up slowly, brushing dust off my cheek and looking around me.

The sight nearly brought me to tears. I was in the very first place the Doctor had taken me to, New York in the 1920s. I hadn't seen this place in years. I ran for cover in between two buildings, the shade between them acting as a sort of camoflage as younger me and the Doctor stepped out of the TARDIS. I looked at myself, eyes widened and lit up with amazement. I wished more than anything that I could be that girl again. That I could just start all over from the beginning.

I froze as I felt my own eyes lock onto me, looking at me intently. She...me...tilted her head slightly, turning for a moment to tell the Doctor, and I took that as my cue, sprinting through the line of buildings, out of sight by the time she turned back around.

All the times I had seen the girl in the shadows, it was me. All that time I had spent wondering who had saved me all those times, it had been my own self all along.

My moment of realization was interrupted by a sharp pain in my stomach. I staggered back against the wall, coughing wracking over me. The side effect was back. I fell to the ground, waiting for it to pass. Green light swirled around me and faded away repeadedly, flashing me forward and backward in time erratically with every cough. I was going through two side effects at once.

"They should really make a warning label on these," I groaned, pulling myself to my feet as it ended.

I found myself near the restaurant the Doctor and I had eaten at to get to know each other better. I peered through the window, watching as the two of us laughed. I felt the time ticking away in my head once again, like a built in clock. I savored the last moments of the wide smile on the Doctors face, and the light sound of our conversation muffled by the glass.

I took a deep, shuddering breath, the warmth of the moment diminished by fear as the white light consumed me once again. I knew where I was going next.

I closed my eyes as the light faded. I felt the familiar icy winds of December in New York City years ago whip over me, and the loose planks beneath my feet. I was on the roof once again. Except this time I didn't have to hide. My past self was not here, for this was the time I had chosen to erase her, so that I could take her place. I smiled as I heard a familiar wheezing noise split sharply through the air.

He stepped out, grinning as he saw me. "Beautiful view up here, isn't it?" He strolled towards me.

Tears threatened to spill down my cheeks, and I decided to allow them. He looked at me, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion at my tears. He was looking at me. I could see him clearly for the first time in weeks since he had died, and he was looking right at me. Not me from another time, present me.

I slowly began to walk towards him, until I couldn't take it anymore. I ran to him as fast as I could, flinging my arms around him and squeezing him tightly, burrying my face in his shoulder. My tears soaked the fabric of his jacket, and I breathed him in. His arms remained outward for a moment, shocked, until he slowly laced them over me. I released him, looking into his pale green eyes, something I thought I would never be able to do again.

I gently placed my hand on his cheek. "Doctor," I said softly. I had missed him so much.

"Who are you?" He asked quietly. I laughed breezily, tears coursing down my cheeks. I sniffled, sweeping them away with my sleeve.

"That's right," I said with a laugh that sounded more like a sob. "I guess you don't know me, yet." I gently placed his tattered bow tie from that day in his hands, wrapping his fingers around it like an envelope. He looked down at it, and looked back up at me with confusion clouding his eyes. I always loved when he was confused, his face scrunched up and his eyebrows furrowed.

I stepped away, backing towards the edge of the roof.

"And now I guess you never will," I tried to smile, but my lip quivered uncontrollably, "It's better that way anyways, the universe needs you much more than they ever needed me. Besides, I was supposed to die here a long, long time ago."

I stiffened as I felt the backs of my sneakers touching the edge.

"God, I wish I wasn't so scared," I muttered to myself, shaking wildly, "I guess that means you did it. Just like you promised you would. You gave me something to live for."

The Doctor continued gazing at me, at loss for words. He would never remember me again, everything that we had ever been through was about to be erased.

"Thank you for everything. I wouldn't have changed a thing," I whispered, spreading my arms out by my sides and pushing back against the edge. "Goodbye."

"No wait!" The Doctor reached out to me, but it was too late.

I knew that I was falling, but it didn't feel like I thought it would. I didn't feel terror, nor did my life flash before my eyes. I was flying. My arms felt like wings at my sides, the wind rushing through them. I closed my eyes, feeling the cool air rush against my face and rustle through my hair. I was lost in a world of thoughts. I thought of the Doctor, the TARDIS, the adventures. I thought of the stars glittering outside my bedroom window in the TARDIS every night. I thought of my mom and dad and little brother. The dream that had been traveling with the Doctor was over now, and it was time to wake up.

I opened my eyes to see the ground rushing up to meet me. I smiled, my last thought of floating in the stars. I felt my entire body collide with the ground, and everything went black.

~o0o~

If you liked this book then make sure to check out my new DW fanfiction, Time! Comment and tell me what you liked about this story, and/or what you didn't like!