An Impossible Love [l.t au]

51.

So turns out that I really did have breathing problems because apparently, I blacked out and Louis drove me home. Which I don't know where the car came from since we literally had walked, but oh well. My eyes shot open in the car and he explained that I fainted and I'm sure he had somewhat of an idea to a reason why I did, much to my embarrassment. It's not my fault Louis makes my heart do weird things.

Of course, it wasn't my first kiss. But that was something I'd dreamt about since I was fifteen. After all these years, it finally happens. I guess dreams do really come true, and the best part is, I wasn't even expecting it. I didn't make it happen this time.

Dad wasn't home this morning when I woke up with the biggest gigantic smile ever. I didn't even think me smiling this big was possible. Later, a text was sent saying that he took the early shift. Still not being able to wipe the smile off my face, I eat my breakfast in peace and wait for Brendon to send me a text saying he's outside and ready for school.

The car doors were unlocked when I pulled on them. "Hi!"

"Hey," Brendon and Sarah say in unison like they normally do.

Brendon starts driving the car out the driveway and this time, I don't bother putting my headphones on. "Soo...how was your day, guys?"

Sarah glances back at me for a second and pulls down her shades. "It was...fine. You feeling okay?"

"Me?" I ask. She nods and I give a little chuckle. "Of course, Sarah. Are you feeling okay? You should feel good, today. And everyday, for that matter!"

Brendon whistles. "Either Alex's high, or just won a trip to Neverland, because-"

The car pulls out to the school. I'm the first one to get out, cutting Brendon off with a 'Sorry, gotta go! Have a good time, see you at lunch.' and then zoom out. My shadow doesn't seem to appeal to me today, but I still look down at it for a couple seconds. The mock is there, though I mentally smile at it.

Today's a great day. I'm feeling great, you're feeling great, we all should be feeling fucking great.

Let's just all hope Louis doesn't regret anything if I see him today. What if he avoids me? What if he goes off and back to Rachel? He kissed me, though. I don't know the rules of kissing, but I'm pretty sure if he kissed me first then acts as if nothing happened and back to Rachel, he's a jerk.

The day goes by, but let's take a trip to the future when we all meet up at the cafeteria as normal.

"Does anyone know why Alex is so happy today?" Sarah asks.

Patrick shrugs. "Haven't heard anything. You, Elizabeth?"

Elizabeth looks at me behind Patrick and raises an eyebrow. I simply smile at her and sit down in between Brendon and Patrick.

"Oh, Patty-Cakes, Elizabeth doesn't know everything. I'll tell you myself."

They all look at me. I bite my lip and make eye contact with Lizzie. Her eyes widen in realization and gasps.

"Alexandra's in love!" She blurts out and everyone gasps with her.

"What kind of mind magic was that?" Patrick shakes his head.

Then, I'm bombarded with questions.

"What? What about Louis, though?"

"What happened, Alex?"

"Why don't you tell us these things when they're happening?"

"You're over Louis?"

"I swear if you went back to your ex, Alex..."

I would clear up everything if I didn't look around the room and end up locking eyes with Louis for a second. I don't know what I would've expected. Maybe a blank face, maybe an eyebrow raise.

But, no. Neither of that happened.

He looked away.

Not before giving me a smile.

I don't have a chonce to give a wave or anything other than a smile since Lizzie turns her head to look at me again indicating to me that she saw all of that. A smile grows on her face but also mixed with a bit of surprise as she gives out the smallest squeal. A smile appears on my face, as well.

Louis smiled at me. Louis William Tomlinson smiled at me. First. He isn't going to act as if last night never happened. Maybe all of that talk did actually mean something to the boy who barely cares about a lot of things.

Same.

Brendon questions her allegiance, which she responds with, "Alex, why the hell did Louis give you that friendly look?"

It then clicks in Sarah's mind. "You're in love with Louis! ...That sounded kinda stupid coming out of my mouth. You've been in love with him for quiet a while."

I want to correct Sarah and tell her that it wasn't love. What I had was a big crush, but I didn't love him. But since everyone seems kinda happy, my mouth remains shut. If anything, I've fallen in love with him now. Louis doesn't feel the same way now, or maybe not ever, but that's okay. It'll be okay.

Everyone's sharing the same knowing look except Patrick. He has a look of shock and furrows his eyebrows. "I-I'm sorry, when did you and Louis ever start talking?"

Nobody speaks.

"What aren't you all telling me? What have I missed out on?"

~*~

Father came out late night and he looked exhausted. I made sure he gets a proper night sleep since he's been out a lot lately and I haven't been able to spend as much time as I'd like to before I head to college.

Still can't believe I applied and made the same one Louis' going to.

Then for the rest of the night, the night's neighbourhood light had allured me in to stare over it from my room and think even more. The thoughts aren't as bad as they used to get in the middle of the night, but maybe that's because I'll remind myself every five minutes that I still have fanfiction if anything gets too bad.

You know, I never really realized how much of an effect Louis has on me. Sometimes, it scares me because it reminds me just how crazy people go over love. All the things they'll do to get a grasp of the emotion and just what it could do to them.

When Louis said he doesn't believe in love, it got me thinking a bit. I didn't believe in love last year. But the power was so underestimated, and I only got that last night. This whole year has been me wondering if it really was real.

So is it?

After all the things I've done to get Louis to notice me, I'm sure that was no act of obsession. Must've been the thing most people mistake for insane- love.

a/n: i apologize, i needed to write a filler chapter to get into the good stuff. anyway, just to let you guys know the plan so nobody freaks out:

there's going to be a lot of Alex and Louis fluff, so don't worry about them 'not working out' iM NOT THAT EAKJFHAKJEAKJ.

she's going to get a taste of what it's like to be with the one you love.