Injured

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After almost an hour of arguing I manage to make myself a decent deal with the devil. I'm allowed to see the Loki, but only for tops 20 minutes, and on top of that the conversation will be monitored. But I managed to get them to turn the sound off for the price of allowing Al to come in if she thinks it's getting to dangerous (exactly what counts as "dangerous" was not defined). But I highly doubt it will get there, which leads me to suspect she did this only to have a excuse to butt in if she thinks I can't handle it.Of course I think it's sweet that she worries, but also it makes me more determined to do this by myself.

Oh and also, they were yapping something about it being way to early for me to start moving around, (plus that it's about one in the morning) so the meet and greet will be pushed to tomorrow. Tonight, I should rest.

So that means that I of course spend half the night staring at the ceiling. Al and the rest left after we managed to make an agreement, and even though I begged her Al insisted that I needed the rest. But ironically, of course I couldn't even get a blink of sleep. How typical.

Finally getting fed up with lying on this stupid bed I push myself up and swing my legs over the edge of the bed. I sit there for a moment waiting for the dizziness and pain to pass, swinging my legs slowly. When I finally feel up for it, I stretch my foot out and inch the wheelchair that is beside my bed closer. The fact that they have a wheelchair just lying around (and a whole medical floor) is a bit concerning, but lucky for me.

When the chair is finally close enough, I put the brakes on, (extremely important to remember to do that, and yes I have done this before) lower the bed to the right height, grab the chair by the armrests, and as quickly as possible drag my body on to the chair. This the is hardest part, as it has to be done as quickly, and soundlessly as possible. Only a small whimper escaped my lips before I landed on the seat. Then I just sat there with tears in my eyes, gritting my teeth against the pain and really regretting doing this.

My ribs ache and my gut feels like it's on fire, making me feel dizzy and like I'm going to faint or throw up. Maybe both.  After a few minutes of sitting there breathing as deeply as I dare, the fog starts to clear from my mind. Reaching for the IV drip I attach it to the wheelchair and then slowly start to roll my way to the door. I advance slowly, moving my arms as little as possible. When I finally get to the door, I discover that it's a motion activated sliding door that opens smoothly when I get close. Of course Stark would have all the fanciest gadgets.

I roll out of the room into a wide hallway. God, this place is literally exactly like a hospital. I start rolling down toward the end of the hallway where I can see a faint light shining around the corner. Halfway there I have to take a brake as it's too painful to move my arms. "Why do you have all these fancy things but you don't have a electric wheelchair?" I mutter to myself when I start moving again. What the hell Stark?

I briefly consider going back to my room, but I've made it this far, and I'd have to get in the bed again anyway which I'm not looking forward for.

When I finally round the last corner, I arrive in a very modern lounge area, with one wall made out of glass, three sofas angled toward the window and a small kitchen in the far corner. A full coffee pot is sitting on the counter, and somebody is laying on the sofa. When I get closer I can make out a familiar head of fiery red hair spilling over a pile of pillows.

Al is curled up in a little ball, a baby blue blanket lying over her. A half empty coffee cup is sitting on the tiny coffee table between two of the sofas. I roll over eagerly, and lift the cup to my lips even though my chest protests against the movement. But to my disappointment the coffee is cold and stale making me cringe in disgust.

I place the cup back on the table a bit too loudly, starling Al awake. She sits up and looks around groggily. She stares a moment at me before actually seeing me. "Oh my god Amy what the hell are you doing out of bed!" she exclaims, sounding half worried half furious. She's wearing pajama bottoms and one of my shirts which makes me smile despite her anger.

"Couldn't sleep" I answer her placing a hand over hers. She takes it in hers immediately and we sit there for a moment just looking at each other. Her expression has softened, but the worry in her eyes is still prominent.

"That bed feels way too big without you" she whispers. My hearth clenches in my chest, I hate making her worry. I want to hold her, but I know she won't allow it, with my wounds and all.

Instead I just give her a small smile instead, "It's ridiculously huge". A small laugh escapes her, but I can see the tears shining in her eyes. "Yes, it is" she smiles. But then she looks suddenly bothered. "Amy there was something I had to talk to you about, but then everybody came in and,-" "Everybody expect Stark. Where did he run of to anyway?" I interrupt her unintentionally. Al looks even more at unease.

"Um, it was actually about him I had to talk to you about. Well you see, I came here soon after you arrived, and when I came Stark was sitting in the corner staring at a med chart. At the time I didn't think of it, I was just worried about you and-" she pauses, and I give her an encouraging smile even though I feel like I'm going to be sick. "But then he just stood and left without a word" she whispers looking at me apologetically. My body feels like it's filled with ice cold syrup, barely able to move. "I'm sorry. I think he knows that your his daughter".

The room around me is getting blurry, but I can't understand why. My toes and fingertips are numb, arms to heavy to move and something is stuch in my chest, crushing my lungs. It might be the wound I got earlier, but I'm not sure. I try to breath, but instead I just whimper. I slap a hand over my mouth, trying to supress the hysteria I feel rising up my throat. My face is wet with the tears that are blurring my vision. I try to blink them away, but new ones just keep on replacing the old ones.

I feel Al's hand grab mine, and I can see her green eyes, soft and worried, anchoring me to sanity. She's rubbing my arm, telling me to take deep breaths, that everything is fine and that she's here.

After a too long while of fighting for a breath, I can breath easier and my pulse starts slowing down. My body is still shaking and I feel a headache coming but I'm okay. Sighing heavily I look at Al. She's holding both of my hands tight in hers, and her eyes are strained with worry.

"I'm sorry" she murmurs, lifting her had to caress my face. I close my eyes and lean into the touch. A sigh escapes me again, and my body starts to feel like it weighs a hundred pounds, pulling me down. "I just don't know what to do" I whisper, silent tears still falling.

"Talk to him" Al says, sounding surprisingly firm. My eyes fly open in shock. She's looking at me with determination but also kindness. "Amy, you can't run away from this. Sooner or later you will have to confront him about this, and it's better for you if it's on your terms, not his"

She's right of course, but it's still so hard. I've spent all my time after finding out about him and my mom hating him. I used to fantasies about how if he had just been there for us she wouldn't be dead. It's stupid of course, but still. He should have at least checked up on her.And it wasn't like she disappeared of the face of the earth! He could have found her. He could have found us.

I don't actually think I wan't Stark to be my dad, but I would have wanted the possibility.

Sighing I look back up at Al. She's looking back at me with love and support, and I feel almost physical pain because of how much I love and appreciate her in that moment. "Your right. I'll talk to him". 

Instead of saying anything, she just squeezes my hand tighter, and it's enough.

A/N: Um hello. Have you missed me during these two years of inactivity? This update is not a promise of more chapters,but I'll try.

~Love, Mama Magic

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