Fragile Heart

The One I Love

I served his parents food. It was a night filled with fun even with only a few people. His parents decided to leave early because they have a business trip to go to the next day. Everyone got so tired and tipsy or drunk and the two of us left the scene earlier. It is the night that ill give myself fully to him. We entered the room, the moonlight shone specifically in the bed its as if its signaling that we take no more time to waste. I took the wine and offered him, we tossed for our six years together. I took my shirt off and laid in the bed, he followed afterwards, taking everything off and leaving nothing. I stripped underneath the covers of the bed and tossed each piece towards him. He got so excited that im seeing him with a starving and sexual look. He laid in the bed and without a doubt I took charge. I made him to lie down and kissed him, even tasting the wine he just drank. I reached for the drawers beside the bed to get the bottle of lubricant. I kissed his neck down to his navel and I slowly licked his balls up to his ravaging member. I took him in my mouth that made him moan and begged for more. And when I stopped I gave him a grin, he was looking down on me which made it more sensual. He reached for my head and kissed me, he then whispered in my ears, that he loves me so much. While I was kissing him I secretly opened the bottle of lubes and applied on my bottom. I then poured more in my hands and rubbed his member up and down making sure it was well lubricated, I could feel his huge member in my hands wanting more than just a jerk off. So I broke the kiss, posistioned myself and while I was doing it, he asked if I was sure. I am very sure. I was on top and I prepared and researched myself for the best possible position for first timers. I slowly pressed my bottom to his huge member, I could feel him tearing me up, but I know it was part of. When everything was in, I breathed and relaxed and he cooperated by not moving, maybe understanding that I am still in pain. After a moment I decided to move, I could feel pain, but a tinge of pleasure in it. He just let me ride him. Until I got used to the pain, and all I could feel more is pleasure. He started moving his hips when he felt the cue of me starting to feel pleasure of him inside me. I moaned while I was riding him and while he was meeting my movement with the movement of his hips. Then he pulled it off, I then felt a tinge of pain but it was nothing compared to what I was feeling. He made me lie face down, and then slowly inserted his member into my bottom again. His movement was slow and pushing deep, he held my hips and raised it high. He held mine and whispered in my ears the words that he love me while he was moving his hips, he was rubbing mine. The sensation it felt was great and intoxicating that I couldnt control my moans and called his name, I was so into his slow and deep thrust. Then slowly he changed his pace, he was not gentle anymore, he was thrusting harder and faster, pulling his member with no caution and made me lie down to face him. He then entered into me, he isnt gentle anymore,  I swear I felt myself bleeding, I told him to take it slowly coz im still not used it, but he didnt listen. He raised both my legs and thrust harder and faster, I know then that I was bleeding and in pain, it wasnt pleasure for me anymore. I told him to take it slowly, but he only made it faster, I know he is far from coming. I was crying, I kicked him pulling his huge member out and I curled up in pain. He then got mad at me.

Carlos: you are such a cry baby.
Me: I told you to take it slowly but you didnt listen!
C: you are already enjoying it.
M: I was until you got rough!
C: I dont get you!

He then walked out of the door angry leaving me naked and crying, curling up in pain. My imagination of it was different from what he did. I thought it to be pleasurable through and through. When I feel like I could manage to stand up, I took a towel and showered. When the water poured on me I felt so much pain in my bottom and I saw that the water in my legs are red, I knew then that I got lacerations from what he did. I just didnt mind the pain from it I just allowed water to flow on me and cried. I gathered my thoughts together got dressed and decided to take for a walk and also look for him and apologize because that was suppose to be my gift for him but failed. A bit limping I took the trail below our room. The cemented trail is narrow and to its left are some rooms and trees and to its right is the sea  splashing. I sat at the trail and just stared into the endless nothingness of the sea allowing the water to occasionally touch my feet, while still feeling the pain from my bottom. I felt hopeless of not seeing him. I just sat there thinking where would our relationship will go after this, if it would still go on or come to an end. I decided its futile to look for him, I lie down on the trail with my feet hanging and being touched by the sea, maybe will just sleep there or whatever. The silence and solemn area that I was enjoying to calm myself was broken with noises of what sounds like humans, since I dont get goosebumps I went into the direction of it. As I get closer the sound seems to be from someone who is relieving himself by the beach, so I took slow steps so that ill be able to see whos doing it(peeping tom alert!) I posistioned myself by a tree so that id be able to get a good peek coz it seems like the sound is coming just a distance from the tree I chose, when I took a peek, I saw Carlos fucking his what he told me his new found friend. The one I was hearing was his friend, I just looked at them in pain to know that I was betrayed and I was the one who caught him in the act. Carlos' hips moves fast the way he wanted it and his friend recieved just the way Carlos want it that I cant give. Carlos was even kissing this friend of his, with hiis legs on his shoulders I could see no trace of pain from the face of his friend only pleasure. The moon is so cruel that it even shone on them for me to clearly see them doing the act. Carlos then placed his friends legs on his right shoulders fucking him sideways now, Carlos body glistening in sweat, his moans are getting more erotic, he said moments from now he would cum and his friend responded that he was too. They both reached and came together. He kissed his friend and said "till next time" which his friend responded "ill be waiting". And I was there, heard it clearly and it was sure that our relationship is over to him, I never moved from where I was, they got dressed still not noticing me until they passed by me. His friend saw me and was startled and when Carlos saw me, he asked if I just got there. I stood up, looked at him, smiled and said "what you think?" And I gave his friend the strongest punch I could muster, containing all the frustration and pain of being betrayed from that punch and said "nice friend of yours" and started walking away from them, I told myself not to shed a single tear while I was walking away. Carlos went running for me and grab my arms and held it hard and made me face him.

Carlos: youve seen everythingthing didnt you
Me: I didnt just see things I also heard things which I shouldnt hear.
C: its all your fault
M: why is it my fault then tell me?
(Our voices was a bit loud while I am still containing my tears)
C: if only you werent such a cry baby this wouldnt happen.
M: I told you, and you know this is my first time! And its not a ground to cheat if you really feel love for me.
C: first time, you even flirt! How would I know if your telling the truth and not bitching around!
M: flirting huh? Who am I flirting with huh? Bitching around? Dont treat me like your friend!
C: my brother! Your flirting with my brother! So dont you just put the blame on me! I saw you earlier!
M: you are so low! I already told you there was an accident.
C: you should have just endured it! You would have enjoyed!
M: all it was is just sex for you huh! Is there a bet behind this?
C: yes! You are just a bitch I want to conquer, I wonder how I didnt drop you and stayed for six years!
(When I heard what he said I couldnt help my tears it just rolled down my face)
M: I understand now, then we are over are we?
(When he heard the word over its as if cold water was poured over him)
C: im sorry, I admit it is my fault. Please dont leave
(But my resolve is final, its over)
M: I never thought that the one I love will cause me so much pain. But I heard everything, he waits for you, you kissed him and you were passionate while doing it. How will I trust you.
C: please dont, I didnt intend too, I was mad, he was there seducing me and I am hungry for a release that you deprived.
M: lets just stop, you made your point earlier, I am just an item to you, I am human not your sex toy Carlos.

I didnt hear him talk, ive been tired and in pain. I ran away from him not minding the warning pain of my bottom. Its as if everything sink in from what I saw and happened earlier. I ran and ran away until I reached a large stone cliff, and climbed its peak. I sat seeing the once beautiful beach now was dull because of the pain love has caused me. I stayed there and cried my heart out, I blamed myself through and through for being weak, for not enduring pain, for being nosy and for staying and watching them. Flashbacks of our happy moments lurked like movie in front of me, moments where I thought this is impossible to happen and moments I though heartbreak is far a distance to be seen. I was thinking should I come back to him? Should I just forget what he did? Should I just forget what I saw? Should I just forget what he said? Should I beg, kneel and tell him everything is ok and I will forget about it. I was in deep thoughts that I didnt feel that I was getting cold and sick until I fainted.