Chapter 16

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Taking a final look at my now bare chambers the reality of my current Taking a final look at my now bare chambers the reality of my current situation now painfully sinks in. The time has finally come to leave my home. There is every certainty that I will never see this room again, this room that has been my sanctuary for as long as I can remember. The only place where I could be my true self. A place that I must now leave behind. Although the future ahead of me is a bright one, full of opportunity and prosperity, at this moment, I feel as though a heavy weight sits upon my chest. The nakedness of the room, devoid of all that was familiar, fills me with fear and uncertainty of what may lie ahead and whether I am strong enough to adapt. 



After another deep, shaky breath inward, I turn and stride across the room, my riding boots echoing off of the stone floor. Now is not the time to dwell upon my fears. Stopping at my bed I bend and pick up a blue cloak that Enid had left out for me. I swing it over my shoulders and fasten it at my neck. Pausing only for a second, I then leave the room without looking back, closing the door behind me for the last time. As I do, I feel a pang of sadness and I feel the tears threaten. Another deep breath and I hold my head up high and focus on the corridor before me. No tears fall. As I walk, I pull my hair free from beneath the cloak, pull it over my shoulder and I tie it into a messy braid ready for the ride out of Cameliard and towards Camelot.


At the end of the next corridor, both Father and Arthur are already there waiting for me. They both smile as I approach and I feign a happy one in return. I see the sadness in Father's eyes and a hint of concern in Arthur's, but I hold the smile on my face. The last thing I want is a sympathetic conversation about how I'm feeling for I fear that will break me down. I just need to get underway and perhaps think about all of this later. 



With mock confidence, I ask; "Are we all ready? Is everything in order?"  

Father speaks first; "Yes, we're all ready. Much of our belongings have gone on ahead of us, along with most of Arthur's men. They will make faster progress than us. We will travel in a smaller group behind."  

Arthur adds; "Indeed. We shall travel with only the provisions we need, accompanied by my best knights and Merlin. Those that have gone on ahead will quick-march to Camelot."  

I nod; "Fair enough, I doubt we could match their pace and there is no need to slow the progress of more men than we have to. I am sure they are eager to return to their homes. How many will accompany us, Arthur?"  

"Just under two-hundred men, my Lady," Arthur says softly, searching my eyes for a gauge of how I am feeling at this moment.  

I quickly avert my gaze; "Excellent! Well, I am ready when you both are."  

With that, we leave the Keep and walk down the steps to the front courtyard, where our troupe and horses were waiting for us.



As we check over the horses and begin to mount, Arthur addresses us all; "Good morning, friends. We all know our destination and I know many of you are eager to return to your homes and families. We may be going home, but we must still ride with caution. We are, of course, riding with King Leodegraunce and Princess Guinevere and their safety is paramount. As such, they will ride between two groups of my best knights."  

He beckons over Lancelot and Gawaine and speaks with them briefly. They both nod once he finishes instructing them and then each directs a group of twenty men to form up; Lancelot's group in front and Gawaine's behind Father and myself.  

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