TODAY'S WORLD

05

             Lubπα Sufyαπ
          

CHAPTER 5.

That is how farida burst into the room and find her. Her face clutch in her hands. Her body shaking with her sobs. Ziyada run to her.

Hug her and they cried.

Together they cried for the cruelty of what has been done to ziyada.

For the stupidity of what ziyada have done to herself. For giving nadeem the key to destroying her life.

*

5 HOURS LATER.

"Are you ok?"

farida asked ziyada for the God knows how many times since she controlled her sobs and could managed a nod.

But ziyada is far from being ok.

She is hurt,inside her,under her rib cage,hiding somewhere deep beneath her lungs,there's raw,sliced open flesh that ziyada is not sure if it will ever close up.

"We need to talk then."

Farida said in a serious tone. Ziyada started taking deep breaths.

In. Out.

In. Out

By the eight breath,she managed to banish most of the fear and tune out the pain. She is ready to hear:

''this is all you fault''

''how can you be this stupid?''

What are we going to do now? Farida asked to ziyada's suprised.

''I don't know''

ziyada answered softly. That is how they plan and plan. Think and keep thinking. But at the end one thing is clear.

Those pictures will keep circulating for God knows how long. Forever may be.

Ziyada couldn't sleep that day.

She keep turning and tossing on her bed.

Feeling all her world crashing and leaving her with nothing to hold onto.

*

IN THE MORNING.

Farida is already up and ready. She touch ziyada shoulder in a comforting way.

''You can report in sick ziyada''.

''We have been reading for this paper farida i can do this''

Ziyada said with more assurance than she feels. She used one of ziyada's Niqab that she used to wear now and then to cover her face. But deep down ziyada feels naked,exposed.

Tears fill her eyes. As the went out she feels her legs wobbling. She is not sure about writing the exam anymore.

*

As the pass group after group of people on campus ziyada could feel the weight of their stares on her back.

Their whisperings,some tried to keep it low some don't give shit if she heard it or not. She hold farida's hand for support.

She heard someone shout

''ziyada you look hotter with you clothes off''

and people burst out laughing.

Ziyada couldn't do it. She run crying. Run all the way back to there room ignoring farida's call.

*

She closed the door behind her and fall facedown on the bed crying her heart out.

''I can't do this......God......I....I.....can't please.....make.....it...stop''

she screamed between sobs. She cried and cried untill she fall into a restless sleep.

*

A WEEK LATER.

Farida helped ziyada report that she is sick. She used the whole week staying indoor. Crying and eating only when farida insist and threaten to shove it in her herself.

''ziyada what is done is done. You have to pull yourself together''

farida said

"Hmm farida yazanyi? You will never understand how i am feeling. This is just the begining. What if this reach home? It will....it will destroy baba''

she finished wiping the tears that are falling. Farida stood up. Not wanting to discuss the issue further.

"sai na dawo"

she said softly. Ziyada give her a small smile and watch her leave the room for that day's paper.

*

15 MINUTES LATER.

The way farida burst inside the room crying made ziyada asked her wide eyes.

''lafiya? What is wrong''

She just stand their looking at ziyada and wiping the tears that couldn't stop falling. She collapsed on the carpet crying. Without knowing the reason ziyada started crying too.

They hold each other and cried. Ziyada asking her what is wrong between sobs.

''life is so unfair to you ziyada''

she managed sobbing harder.

''It can't be worse than it is farida.....just...just tell me'' ziyada said. ''oh.....God.....it is.....it is.....the expelled you.....someone.....someone report to the school authority.....you are expell ziyada....i am so sorry.''

farida finised her voice breaking.

Ziyada just stared at her feeling numb.....feeling everything and nothing at the same time. Feeling the darkness lurking..................................!!!