Chapter 19: was it too late?

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jungkook stand still on the same spot where jimin left him. there's a lot going on in his mind right now and its all about jimin. he just couldn't believe how could he never realized about how jimin felt about him and how he felt about jimin. all this time, it was jimin that he loves. 

"jungkook ah" yoongi called his name. 

jungkook lift his head, looking at yoongi. jungkook looks like a dead person in yoongi's eyes. 

yoongi take a sit and pull jungkook to sit next to him. he holds jungkook's hand while looking straight into his eyes. 

"what happened between you and jimin?" yoongi asked calmly. he's trying to make jungkook calm down too. 

"hy-- hyung..... i... i made a mistake. i've a fool. how can i don't realize that jimin is..... i'm just.... stupid... i missed him... i love him hyung... i just... i told him and he.... he... he just...." jungkook tried to talk in between his tears. 

yoongi pats jungkook on the back "i know... i know... calm down.." 

"jungkook ah... i don't know how to make things right again. you have to think about this. you have tae and jimin is with jinyoung now. i thought you love taehyung? wasn't you? so where did loving jimin comes from? and did you think that things would be okay if you tell him that you love him now that you're dating his best friend? you do know how much jimin loves taehyung right? jimin would die for taehyung! now tell me, who really is in your heart now?" yoongi tried to clear things up. 

"at first, i thought i love taetae hyung. maybe i did... or maybe i thought that i love him. i never thought of jimin hyung as he's always by my side. but when he's not with me, i missed him.. i missed his touch, i missed his love, i missed everything about him. when he's with me, i feel like my world is complete. it might be late for me to realize this but, the one that send me butterflies was jimin hyung all along, not anybody else." jungkook's eyes starts to get teary again. 

"jungkook.... if you feel that way about jimin, why did you date taehyung?" 

"i thought i love taehyung. no! i do love taetaehyung. but it's not the same. those feeling for taetae hyung is not.... not like a lover should have." 

"jimin hyung, he... he's different. i get jealous when he's with someone else, even if it's jin hyung. i feel like i'm not special when he's with someone else. i hate those smiles that he gives to everyone else except me. i hate when he's not giving me his attention. i'm greedy about him, i want him for me only. but i haven't been aware that that's what love is all about. wanting someone to be happy with me, wanting someone to be mine and that person is park jimin." jungkook literally confess everything to yoongi. 

yoongi was shoocked. he didn't know that jungkook was so in love with jimin. jungkook never show it. he noticed that jungkook had something in his eyes whenever he looks at jimin sometimes. but he never thought that jungkook was really in love with jimin. 

"jungkook ah... i... i'm not sure what i should say... but if you really don't love taehyung, talk to him, end this shit for god sake. don't hurt him or yourself by hanging onto this fake relationship anymore. about jimin.... i couldn't say anything. he already has someone in his life. i think we should just wish him happy. its better that way." yoongi couldn't say that everything that slipped from his mouth is good or not for all of them, but he really didn't know how to fix things up. jungkook was too late. 

jungkook keep his silence. yoongi was right. he need to end this! there's no point of hanging onto this fake relationship if both of them doesn't feel the love. 

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jinyoung notice that jimin is being silent since he pick jimin up from Bighit. jimin spaced out a lot, and he didn't talk too much. it's weird for jinyoung because usually, jimin would always be happy when he picks jimin, jimin would talk endlessly about how jin's dad jokes makes namjoon and yoongi mad or how taehyung would whines when they practices too much and he would be pity for taehyung or how hoseok push them into hard practice and makes them exhausted. jimin would always be smiling and talking to jinyoung, but not today and jinyoung knew something was wrong. 

"hey manggaetteok." jinyoung touches jimin's cheek. 

jimin flinched in shocked. he was surprised at jinyoung's touch. suddenly he realized that he's in their house. he was spacing out too much. 

"hy--hyung. sorry.. i didn't notice that it was you" jimin held jinyoung's hands but didn't look at him in the eyes. 

"babe, is something wrong? you've been spacing out. no words coming out from that mouth of yours. i thought that the goblin had caught your tongue." jinyoung caress jimin's knuckles. 

"nothing... i'm just tired. i guess." jimin still keep his head low. 

jinyoung sense something wrong is happening and a really bad one too. no matter how lame his joke is, jimin would still be laughing but now, jimin just answer him word by word. 

"jiminie, don't lie to me. we promised to not keep anything between us right?" jinyoung lift jimin's face, facing him. 

"hyung... i'm sorry... jungkook... jungkook confess to me." jimin couldn't help it. he need to tell jinyoung about this. 

jinyoung was shocked. he never thought that jungkook would confess. on top of that, jinyoung thought that jungkook didn't love jimin. 

"so? what did you say?" jinyoung tried his best to stay calm. 

"he's not really in love with me. he's just missed me like others would." jimin's eyes starts to get teary. 

"what if... what if he's really in love with you? what will you do?" jinyoung looks at jimin in the eyes. he needs the answers. 

"i would kill him. he's with taehyung now. if he really mean what he said then what about taetae? i don't want tae to be sad. he's broken enough hyung." jimin lift his head, looking into jinyoung's eyes. 

jinyoung didn't get the answer that he wanted to hear but it's a relief to know that jimin would not be leaving. at least not now. 

"jimin ah... did you.. still have any feelings for him?" jinyoung was nervous. 

jimin froze. he didn't know what his answers would be. he wanted to move on, he's happy with jinyoung. but deep down in is heart, he couldn't lie. his loves towards jungkook stand firmly in his heart. but he couldn't hurt jinyoung. 

"..................... i'm.. i'm happy with you hyung" jimin looks down on his toes once again. 

again, that's not the answer that jinyoung wants but he know he couldn't force jimin to love him. 

"jiminie, go get some rest now, and try not to think about this okay?" jinyoung kiss the back of jimin's hand and pat his hair. 

jimin just nod and go straight to his room. he needs some sleep. he's been thinking to much that his surroundings felt suffocated. he really didn't want to upset jinyoung but his mind and feeling was so mixed up right now. he needed some rest. 

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