Second Chance

One's End is Another's Beginning

One's End is Another's Beginning

I feel the sunshine on my face,  the warmth of the sun heating my skin.  It's quiet.  My breathing even and strong. 

I'm not dead?  I didn't die?  How did I survive?  Did James fake my death?  Hope fills me up thinking that James really did fake my death.  If that was the case then he really did love me the way I love him.

Slowly my eyes flutter open, above me is a wooden ceiling. The bed I'm sleeping in is hard and the blanket covering me is thin.  I slowly look around the big room and notice simple and sparse but clean room.  To my right by the window is a worn down chaise, at one point the fabric would have been a royal blue, now it has faded into a light blue with splotches of the once royal blue.  The worn legs of the chaise is has splashes of gold in between the groves of the once finely detailed design. I turn my head to the left and a dresser with a large mirror on top was pushed all the way to the far corner.  A small table with four chairs was placed in the middle of the room right in front of a door. 

Where am I?  Did James really save me? 

Suddenly I hear light foot steps approaching the door, quickly close my eyes and free my hands from under the blanket.  Readying myself to grab who ever was approaching.  The door opens and the light steps approach the table, sounds of clinking porcelain and the smell of green tea fills the air. 

"Young Miss," the girl called lightly.  "It is past noon and you're still in bed?" 

The girl fiddles with the tea set as she pours the tea into the cup.

"Well, I suppose I'll let you stay in bed for a while longer seeing how embarrassing your actions were last night.  It's all everyone can talk about!" 

The girl places the tea on the table, "I've also brought pastries, your favorite, to soothe the pain those stuck up royals caused you!"

Young Miss? Royals? Julianna wondered. Who is she talking to? Is she talking to me?

I take a peak at the young girl and through my lashes I see a mop of dark brown hair sitting down at the table with a cup of tea in her hands.  One hand holding the tea cup the other tightly gripping the table.

Still talking to herself she continues, "To think that those royals call themselves our rulers
when they cant't even keep their own word! It was their own grandfather, King Jonas, Goddess rest his soul, that arranged this marriage between them and our family then for them to annual the marriage contract is a complete travesty!  Annulling the marriage under the deplorable excuse of "nonexistent cultivation" and "nonexistent skills!" 

The more she ranted the more her voice became loud and shrilled.  "And for them to announce this in front of every important family house in this Four Kingdoms!  How dare they!  As if they couldn't of just told your father alone in their study! But for them to shame you and this family in front of everyone!  How could they!  And... and..and then for them to announce the marriage between oldest Miss and your own young prince that you've been betrothed to since birth!  The audacity of the royal family!" 

Wait what?  Arranged marriage, bad. Annulled marriage, good! Four Kingdoms? Where am I? And now whoever oldest Miss is, now she's getting married to the young Prince? That's fine by me.  Julianna thought to herself.

She takes a large gulp of the tea burning her tongue, but continuing on with her one sided conversation.  "And for them to then parade all around the ballroom as if it was a love match!   Dancing and laughing in each other's arms the whole night!   And you!  I thought you would have handled yourself better!   You!  Young Miss!   You have always behaved with decorum, but you let yourself drink too many drinks and behave with such frivolity and unladylike behavior!  Throwing yourself to everyone and anyone!  Your mother would have your back side had she still be alive!  And me!   I'm responsible for you!  Do you know what kind of tongue lashing I got from Master Harvey!  Now, no more wallowing in your disgrace from last night!  Your tea is getting cold and your pastries are all being eaten up by me!"

The pipsqueak of a girl has more strength then I thought as she pulls me up from bed so I'm forced to sit up.  My legs dangle on the side of the bed as I try to situate myself and all the information she just told me.  Suddenly the memories of this young idealistic girl floods through me.   The death of a loving mother.   The anger from her father.  The shame of not being able to cultivate energy.  The lack of strength and power to learn how to fight.  The humiliation of be known as "wasteful trash".  The bullying from family members and outsiders. The only hope and reason to live was the betrothal to the young Prince Ivan.  The hours upon hours in the library reading books ranging from laws and government to gardening and flower arranging.  She was taught at an early age how to act like a lady by a strict Royal tutor who expected nothing but perfection.  Then Julianna remembered what happened last night, the humiliation of the announcement of the broken engagement.  The heartbreak of the engagement of her eldest sister to her Prince Ivan. 

Prince Ivan,  who gave her hope.  Who told her he would love her with or without power or skills.  Who made promises of the future so she could keep on living through her own hell of a life.  Prince Ivan who danced and laughed and held Maria throughout the night.  So although the young Miss was heartbroken she decided to live that night knowing she would swallow a few handfuls of pills when she got home to end her sad excuse of a life.  So she laughed heartily, she flirted wantonly, she drank profusely and danced with abandonment. Then she came home, walked into the small infirmary that was located on the first floor and grabbed all the pills she could find.  In her drunken haze she swallows handful after handful of pills and somehow makes her way to her room, striping her dressing gown and accessories off.  She crawls into bed with a single thought before her last breath. 

"I lived."

Tears streaked down Julianna's face.   As she remembers the life the young Miss Jemma Brooks.  The loneliness, the suffocating feeling of feeling helpless and alone, but most of all the heartache of broken promises and love.  Julianna's hand touches her face. 

Why is my face wet? Are these tears? What is this feeling I'm feeling?  What is the name to describe this feeling? Is this...it can't be...  is this feeling empty?

Julianna shakes her head again wiping away tears on her cheek then suddenly her head jerks up quickly. 

Wait... does that mean she, Julianna Jewels actually died!  That, that James Monroe actually killed her and didn't fake her death!  That @#%&er! 

A new determination fills through her.  She will get her revenge!  It wasn't the revenge that she wanted, but Julianna would live her second life for both of them!  She would show all those who looked down on Jemma and make them pay! 

Julianna stands up and walks towards the dresser with the mirror and looks at her "new" self.  She is young with black hair that reaches her waist, her porcelain skin, unblemished and pale.  Her almond eyes, blazes a blue violet fire.  Her full pink lips, frowns into her heart shaped face.  Julianna looks down on her body and frowns even more!  Her body is thin, wafer thin, not an ounce of muscle!   The only good thing was her height that Jemma's bully teased her about.  Julianna frowns even more.  To be powerful she needs to come up with a new training plan to get her new body it tip top shape.  All her killer instinct and skills are still embedded into her memory from her previous life.   Julianna just couldn't utilize any of those skills yet with her current wafer thin body.  But looking back into her "new" self she nods.

This is just the beginning.