' contrast ' - jason mccann

3

After we ate, Jason left. I watched his shiny, black car drive until he turned off my street then took a shower and went to bed. I thought about him. We spoke while we ate, and it was nice. He wasn't being a sarcastic dick, and I saw a little bit of what I thought was the real Jason. The Jason before the world turned him cold. A Jason I could love.

I don't really know what about him made me want to open up, but when we were sitting on my couch eating unbelievably greasy pizza, I told him things I hadn't told many people.

"Where are your parents," he asked, grabbing a piece of pizza. I sighed.

"My mom is off in Miami on some business or something. She won't be back until like, next week, or something," I spoke, grabbing a piece myself.

"And dad?"

"I don't know where that nigga is," I scoffed. Jason laughed at my vulgar language. "Him and my mom got divorced last year and I haven't seen him since the night he left."

"I'm sorry," Jason said softly. I shook my head.

"It's not your fault my dad is a shitty parent," I said, smiling and trying to boost the mood. "What about your parents?" I asked. "Where were they when Lane was beating your face in."

"And you say I'm blunt," he joked.

"You're the only person I know who's cool enough to let me be blunt." I saw him smile out of the corner of my eye.

"I don't live with my parents," he answered. My eyes widened

"You live alone," I gasped with a mouth full of pizza. He smiled at my shocked expression.

"Nah, I live with my, uh, friend, I guess. But, I didn't want to bother my parents with all my bull, so I left."

"How do you go to school and still have a job to pay rent?" I asked.

"Wanna know a little secret," he whispered. I nodded, my eyes wide, ready for whatever I was about to hear. "It's true." I furrowed my brows.

"What's true?" He rolled his eyes.

"The rumor."

"Which?" I don't think he was aware of the vast amount of rumors that were spoken about him.

"The one about me being a drug dealer."

"Yeah, right." I took this time to roll my eyes.

"Why do you think Lane was at my house? He didn't want his favorite sweater back, he wanted drugs." I scoffed.

"Jason, I'm not that gullible," I laughed.

"How else would I own a big ass apartment in the middle of the city with one roommate?"

"Trust fund baby," I said simply.

"Do you really think any parent would give a kid with grades like mine that much money?" He said flatly.

"Rich ones would."

"Why are you so stubborn," he asked with a big smile on his face.

"I'm not stubborn! I just don't think you're a drug dealer," I shrugged.

"But I am!" He laughed.

"Okay, Jason, I'll play along. You're a drug dealer, a criminal. Why would you tell me all this if it's true?" I said, settling in to hear his response.

"'Cause you got me pizza," he sighed. I laughed. "And it's not like the cops would find me if you told them."

I cocked my brow. "I have your address."

"Baby," he spoke sweetly. "The cops couldn't catch me if they wanted to," he smiled. I rolled my eyes, still sure he was joking.

"Alrighty, Clyde," I said.

"Enough about me and my illegal activities. What's your deal?"

"What does that mean?" I asked.

"You don't want to explain all that, 'no one is real to me' shit you said upstairs?" I felt my cheeks heat up yet again.

"No one is. Since I'm so nice, people assume I'm innocent and try to protect me. Even when I know the truth, people try to protect my feelings and lie to my face. I hate that shit," I said. "People act like they like me and want to be in my life when they simply don't. So many people are so fake to me and just hang with me because they don't know how to say no. Or they make terrible excuses. But, you are brutally honest. If you didn't want to be here, you wouldn't be. And you would tell me. I appreciate that. I know you're genuinely here because you want to be, not because you want to make me feel better about myself," I finished. I felt physically lighter now that I had said that. I'd never told anyone my feelings but Jason was so honest, it was contagious. He looked at me astonished, and my cheeks continued to get hotter.

"Damn, Vivian. You been holding that in a while, huh," he laughed slightly.

"Is it that obvious?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "But, that's trash. That everyone is fake to you and stuff. I'm glad I can be the unapologetically honest person in your life. I am honored." I could tell he was trying his best to be sympathetic, and I appreciated it.

"Thanks for filling the role," I joked. We ate in a calm silence after that, and it was nice. No forced conversation. Just sitting watching the TV blankly. He thanked me before he left, and payed me back for the pizza, though I didn't want his money. I fell asleep thinking about him. Something about the boy really had me feeling some type of way.

I wasn't sure what is was about him, or what type of way I was really feeling, but I was enjoying it.

I was enjoying him.