Chapter 13

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I'm sat in the Salvatore house, their grand fireplace being the only thing to warm my iced heart

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I'm sat in the Salvatore house, their grand fireplace being the only thing to warm my iced heart. Damon offered me his clothes, but i politely declined. We sit in silence for a moment, the coward in me coming forward.

"You slept with him, didn't you?" It's a question that he already knew the answer to.

"Yes," I whisper, "I'm sorry, i didn't have a choice!" My voice rises in sound and i realise the panic, the hurt, the betrayal are all sinking into one big meltdown. "I don't even know how it happened please listen to me-" I cut myself off when he looks at me.

Damon looks down at me, an emotion of something I've never seen on his face flashes before me and I feel even worse; it's hurt. He's hurting because of me. I look away unable to look into his eyes. Ashamed of what happened between me and Stefan, I can't bring myself to see what pain I know I caused.

All of a sudden the hurt I witnessed disappears right before my eyes. In a flash the bookcase beside me comes flying down with a thundering bang and I jump from the crash that echoes around the Salvatore house. I flinch deeper into the chair as he smashes a bottle of bourbon right above my head, it's glass trickling in my wet clothes and cutting into my cold body. I don't cry out even as I bleed, I just silently sob into the thin blanket I'm clutching into for dear life.

I want to beg him to stop but can't form the words needed to prevent his rage.

"I should've been there!" He screams out in anger, speeding up to me he kneels, his face inches from mine and hands either side of my head I'm forced to look into the blue eyes I've grown to love, "I should've been there..." Damons words become strained and sound as if they cause him actual pain to speak. I cry harder and his eyes well.

"I'm so sorry, Damon." I whisper, he looks at me for a moment as his eyes begin to well up for a moment before the tears I know he bears disappear as he lies on my lap, becoming limp in my arms. "I'm just so sorry"

The feeling of complete love for this Salvatore brother overpowered my body and I knew that I'd forgiven him for everything wrong he had done to me in the past. For killing my mother. I forgave him, because I love him.

Coming to this realisation and not knowing whether or not anything is going to be the same makes me clutch his shirt and sob into his neck, knowing that this could be the last possible moment of intimacy and forgiveness between Damon and I, I cry for us. Seeming to share my thoughts he holds me tighter for a single moment then painfully let's me go. Without so much as a glance in my direction he leaves me sitting and crying with an emotionless expression and revengeful eyes.

There was not single sound in the Salvatore house for the rest of the evening. I was alone.

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