"Aye, you alright man?" Dallas asks me, concern lacing with his words as I wince and nod, wiping dirt off my face with the back of my hand as I tie the last knot of the wires together. "Jason I know what you saw was-" I cut him off and glare his way. "I don't care about what I saw or heard Dallas! Just drop it bro." I spat harshly at him. He didn't even flinch but instead gave me a sad, sympathetic look. "Jason I know you're not okay, hell, nobody would be okay after seeing what you saw and h-" I cut him off once again. "Jesus Dallas! Seriously I suggest you shut the fuck up before I place a bullet in your head!" I stand up just to get in his face. "What bro? What you coming up on me like that for? You wanna fight me now? Huh? Go ahead man no ones stopping you!" He shouts, getting in my face as well. "Bro, move." I push him off me and grab the black duffel bag from beside me, slinging it across my shoulder and making my way out of this old stupid warehouse. I walk back into the room that caused me so much pain in so little time. The room where my whole world literally felt like it was falling apart, where my worst nightmare lied right in front of me.
My old bedroom from when I was a kid.
I couldn't stop staring at the figure laying on my old bed, the figure I never got to know. I stare at her and she stares right back at me.
Lifeless.
I feel my breath hitch when I try to breath and my legs feeling like they're going to give out from underneath me at any moment, like the ground was gonna open up and swallow me whole. I let the bag fall from my shoulder and onto the old creaky wooden floors and I slowly walk over to her. I kneel down next to the bed and stroke the dirty blond hair from her face that was covered in dirt. I sniffle as I wipe the dirt away from her face gently with my thumbs and sleeves. I stare into her emerald green eyes that stared blankly back at me, not willing to blink like I so badly needed them to. "I'm so sorry this happened to you." I cried. "Y-you deserved so much better and I-I could've given it to you. I-I'm so sorry sweetheart, a-she didn't tell me y-you existed! I swear I-I would've brought y-you with me. You would've l-lived with me where I c-could've kept you s-safe." I cried full on sobs now. "Please wake up. T-this is just a bad d-dream and y-you're okay in real life." I chocked on my sobs as I realize she's really gone.
My daughter is really gone.
Present:
(Slight sexual content)
I cry into the crook of Avalanna's neck silently as I thrust slowly into her, with her stroking my hair and gently combing through it with her fingers and sweet moans leaving her mouth. "W-why Jay Jay wants baby?" She moans. I stay silent, still thrusting into her at a very slow rate. "F -faster Jay Jay!" She whines but I shake my head against her neck. "I-I need to feel you baby, I just n-need to." I whisper. "I-I'm almost there sweetheart." I groan. "You need to cum first for me baby girl, be a good girl for Jay Jay and let go. Come on baby go ahead." And with those words, she releases all over me and that was enough to trigger me to go over the edge and groan as I fill her up, leaving her whimpering from beneath me. I then collapse gently on top of her and cuddling her naked body to mine. "Bath?" She asks after about five minutes of just us cuddling together in silence. I silently nod against her shoulder and force myself to get up and go into the restroom where I start to run a warm bath for the both of us. When it's done, I call Avalanna inside and I let her get in first and just watch her until she tells me to get in with her, I smile lightly and eagerly get inside, automatically bringing her body to mine and nuzzling my nose into her neck as she plays with my fingers that were interlocked on her tummy. "W-what happened to Jay Jay today? W-why Jay Jay was sad?" She asks me. I shrug, not really in the mood for much talking. I was sad and she knew that and was trying to make me feel better which is one of the many many things that what I loved about her. I just didn't want to talk. She huffs angrily, mad because she didn't get what she wanted like always, and what she wanted this time was for me to speak to her. "T-talk!" She demands. I give her my sympathetic eyes and shake my head sadly at her which seemed to make her mad as well because she huffs again before getting up and out of the bath tub, drying herself off with the towel and leaves the restroom. I groan and get up and follow after her, wrapping a towel around my waist as I go back to the room where she was probably with Drew in earlier when I called her but I had moved Drew to Jazzy's room when we started to 'get busy'. I go to open the door but it's locked and I look down to see a pillow and blanket on the floor along with my boxers and sweatpants and a white t-shirt. Wow. I guess my little miss grew a little backbone. I take the clothes and go into the bathroom once again where I quickly change and then go back out to the hallway where I grab the pillow and lay it down by the door and then I lay myself down so my head rests on the pillow and I cover myself with the thin blanket and lay down by the door and let the tears just stream down my face silently. That's how I spent the rest of my night, no sleep, no words, just me and my fucked up thoughts and the fact that I lost someone so important to me yet I never even got the chance to know.
Rest In Peace to my little angel.
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Okay so yeah, y'all are probably confused af but nonetheless I hope you likes the chapter cause I just wanted to try something different... did y'all like it😬😇 because I hope y'all did. Please tell me what you thought and what you wanna see more/less of and all that good stuff I freaking loved how y'all put all those ideas in the last couple of chapters so PLEASE keep it up.... and I'm working on getting my permit so that's where I'm at rn as I type this waiting for my mother to pick me up😂😂
