Love Hate

Chapter 19

♡ 

Ruby took my car back with her, leaving me to go with Louis.

When we got back to Louis' house, I instantly began to feel worse.

I shouldn't have left. I shouldn't have left my parents. 

I shouldn't have left Noah.

I noticed there was a few cars already parked, the boys and Tony and Paul I assumed, they probably all had keys. 

I slid out of the car, folding my arms across my chest after I pulled my hair free, pulling out my ribbon.

"Come on,"

said Louis, putting his hand on the small of my back as I followed him inside.

I felt bitter and cruel, knowing it wasn't right to be here.

All the loud chatter and laughter in Louis games room stopped, all whispering as they heard the door slam.

Great.

They were all going to feel sympathetic too.

I was moody, now feeling angry at myself.

I glared at the hall, teary eyed, Louis dropping his keys and shrugging off his jacket.

Before Louis could say anything, I heard the familiar clomp of vans, toms and converse.

All of their faces even Paul and Tony appeared around the corner, cautious.

Louis put his hand on my waist, asking me silently if I was ok.

I didn't say anything, shoving my hands in my pockets.

"We're sorry Amelie,"

said Liam solemnly.

Niall came over first as some small tears fell off my face, wrapping his arms around me.

I put my head on his shoulder, thankful for more comfort.

When he pulled away, pecking my cheek, Zayn smiled ruefully taking Niall's place.

Harry followed, swaying us a little, squeezing my hand as he kissed my forehead. 

Liam hugged me, telling me that they left some flowers on the bench.

Paul, hugged me and then Tony who when he pulled away made me feel instantly worse.

"It'll be ok, don't worry,"

he said patting my back.

There could not have been any words worse to say.

"Ok? Don't worry?"

I asked, repeating Tony.

"How could you say that? My brother just died and you want me to 'not worry?'"

I spat cruelly, everyone looking a little taken back by my outburst.

"Think about if you've lost someone close to you. Or imagine if you did. You wouldn't let someone tell you to 'not worry'.  Losing someone isn't like that. But maybe because you are a cruel heartless man you don't give a shit. Fuck you,"

I swore, turning to the door and slamming it behind me.

Everyone's face was shocked, I couldn't believe I had done that myself.

I was mad at myself for leaving Noah and I know Tony meant well.

I just walked and walked. I didn't have a destination. 

 I leaned against the tree, closing my eyes.

I had run out of the street and I walked blocks before I stopped, sinking to the ground, my feet sore.