You And I: On Tour

Connor IX

School soon settled down and Troye and I became just normal students again. The weeks sped by and soon graduation was looming. I had offers from several universities and was trying to make a decision. Troye was helping a little, but since he wasn't going, it didn't matter too much where I chose.

"But California is so far away. When would we see our families?" I asked as I lay on my bed, looking between my laptop and my letter from UCLA.

"We can fly back whenever we want to, Con." Troye reminded me. He was currently sitting at my desk studying for a final exam he had tomorrow.

"You can. I don't have the finances to be flying across the country every other weekend." He sighed and put down his pencil before coming to sit on the bed beside me.

"Connor, what's this on your hand?" He asked, pointing at the promise ring.

"The ring you gave me?" I was confused and my statement came out like a question.

"Exactly. And it means what?"

"That you love me."

"And when I love someone, I do anything for them. And that means if I help you fly back to see your parents whenever you need, then that's what I'll do."

"Troye, I can't let you pay for me to fly across the country all the time."

"Yes you can. I want to do it." He used his finger to tilt my head back so I had to look him in the eye. "You're my boyfriend, I want to be able to spoil you."

"But..."

"No buts." I sighed in defeat, knowing there was no way to argue with him. He grinned and gave me a quick kiss before going back to his studying and I turned back to the laptop, deciding to look at MIT, a little closer to home.

I loved afternoons like this with Troye. Since we'd returned from tour, we spent most afternoons at each other's houses. We made a plan to alternate which house we'd sleep at, despite protests from our parents. Weekends were usually spent at my place since Brandon was nearly always out doing some sporting event or another whereas Troye's brother and sister were at home.

I knew I had to make a decision soon, partly because deadlines were coming up fast but also because Troye and I needed time to find an apartment. Since he wasn't going to be a student, we didn't have the option of using dorm rooms until we found a place. My parents were still a little apprehensive at the idea of me living with Troye but I figured they'd come around to it eventually.

With graduation in just two weeks, everything seemed to be going by so fast and I honestly can't say I'm ready for it.

"Connor...?"

"Hmm?" I looked up to find him staring at me.

"What're you crying for?" I blinked and found tears spilling down my cheeks. I brushed them away quickly.

"I don't know." He started to laugh. "It's not that funny."

"It kind of is."

"I guess I'm just thinking about graduation and the future."

"I thought you were excited about the future." He closed his books and came to sit on the bed beside me again, this time pushing away my laptop and pile of letters. I rolled over so I was on my back with my head in his lap.

"I am. But it's still scary. In less than a year I won't be calling this place home anymore."

"Con, New York will always be home for us. It's where we grew up, where our families are. No matter where we end up, this is home." He ran a hand through my hair and I sighed.

"I know. But I'm still a little wary of the whole thing." Troye was silent for a moment, contemplating something.

"What's bothering you? Maybe I can help."

"You'll think I'm silly."

"Never." He shook his head. "Here, lets move up here so it's more comfortable and you can tell me what's worrying you." We moved so that he was leaning against the headboard. I sat in between his legs, leaning back against his chest as he wrapped his arms protectively around me and pressed gentle kisses to the top of my head.

"Don't get me wrong, Troye, I can't wait to live with you, really." I paused. "It's just our fight on tour keeps nagging me from the back of my head."

"What about it?"

"It was so easy for us to accidentally say the wrong thing and, well, I don't want to make this big commitment only for it to fall apart in a few weeks over something so trivial." My head was against his chest so I felt his heart speed up before he answered me.

"Connor, I understand where you're coming from, I really do. That flight stays in my memories all the time too and it scares me how easily we lost trust in each other." He took a deep breath and continued. "But that's why I gave you the promise ring. It's my promise to never let you lose trust in me again. Even when we do argue, because I know we will, it's a part of life. I will always make sure that you have no reason to not trust me."

"I do trust you. And even in the moments leading up to our fight, I trusted you. But all it took was a slip of the tongue, a split second of not thinking your words through and look what happened."

"I know. But this ring..." He picked up my hand, running a finger over the silver band. "This ring is my way of saying that I'll always think about what I'm saying before I say it. Promise." I tilted my head back to look up at him.

"Okay."

"Okay? Is that all that was bothering you?" I nodded.

"Pretty much. The rest of it is just stuff I watched Dustin and Nicola deal with when they left for college. You know, the idea of living away from home and all that. Growing up."

"At least you don't have to do it alone. I'll be with you every step of the way."

"I know. And I love the idea of that." I twisted myself around so I was pretty much lying on top of him and kissed him.

"And I love the idea of waking up next to you every day, without worrying about our parents coming in." He replied between the kisses he began to pepper across my face. I giggled and captured his lips against my own, losing myself in the feeling as we kissed. 

This was perfect. This was how I wanted my life to be.