Journey (Book 2, Completed)

Part 14

How does one process that sort of information? What do you do when you find out the child you buried, grieved over and spent your whole life regretting not being able to save, isn't what it seems.

What do you do when you've spent years wondering what you could've done differently. Crying every night, locking yourself away for years, too ashamed to look your husband in the eye knowing you failed him. Waking up in the morning every day of your life wishing you would've died peacefully in your sleep so you could be reunited with your baby.

Only to find out, the source of that pain, the pain you went through was a lie? That the child that you loved unconditionally, and put flowers on its grave every year wasn't actually your child.

Dianna not only felt sick to her stomach, she felt as if a piece of her heart has been ripped out of her chest. Everything was a lie, her life was a lie.

She spent her whole life torturing herself over the lost of a child that wasn't even hers. That takes the cake for pain. That is what physical pain felt like.

But that wasn't all. No, dianna didn't get the leisure of having just that. Now, her child who had been ripped away from her without her even knowing had come back to ruin their lives. Because she thought her mother abandoned her.

Dianna had always been the strong one in the family, she guided her daughter's through the abuse of her first husband Patrick. She led them through the darkness and held onto them with strong arms. She always knew what to do and always had a plan. Only now, she was the one that needed saving. She was the one that yearned for comfort. She couldn't get through this alone, she didn't have the strength in her.

She dozes in and out of her distant mind state, not really hearing what Morgan was saying. All she could think about was her child, the one that was still alive. She imagined the sadness the child went through not having a mom. She wondered what her daughter looked like, her smell, the color of her eyes. She longed to look into them, she pictured they were washed in pain and suffering of the years she went through without a family.

She felt the anger her daughter felt when she found out who she actually was. The child that at a young age went to seek out her family only to find they had started over and were living well off. She felt the longing of the girl wishing she was one of them. Wishing they would accept her, wishing she fit into their lifestyle. Hoping they would want her just as much as she wanted them.

Life wasn't as it seemed to be, the Lovato family had secrets, secrets that were now coming to light.

Dianna drove to the cemetery, a bouquet of roses in her hand. Her eyes were empty, her face not masking any particular emotion. All you could see was pain as she stood in front of the grave that read.

Here lies Colton Lovato beloved son who was taken from this world before his time. You will always be in my heart son, I love you more than anything in this world. Sincerely your mom Dianna Lovato.

Dianna dropped to her knees a heartfelt cry leaving lips as she gently placed the flowers on the tomb. "I don't care what they say you're my son Colton, I miss you so much and there's not a day that goes by that I wish you weren't here with me."

No paperwork or DNA  could take the love that she had for Colton away from her. Nothing would change the fact that she did lose a son. She would never stop visiting him, because he was her baby, and was taken from this world before she got the chance to get to know him.

Dianna lie on her side next to Colton grave,  clutching her coat to her chest as a gust of wind nearly blew the flowers out of her hand. She just layed there, because that was the only thing that felt right.