Where have I been?

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Hey guys... I know this isn't an update (I have a knack for being disappointing) and I sincerely apologise; but things haven't been swell for me as of late. Over the last few years I've been struggling with my GAD by myself; I have no real friends to talk to, my parents and relatives are more concerned about my brothers, and everyone else doesn't seem to care. 

I've lost all of my motivation for the things I once loved, writing (isn't it obvious), reading, and even eating! I just lie in bed and think 'what the hell am I doing here?' I just wish that I could just die in my sleep and never have to wake up. I'm sorry if you don't really care and just want me to update; I understand... I just want you guys to know how I'm really feeling.

Anyway, the last few weeks have been progressively beating me down; I have no energy, no happiness, no motivation; just plain sadness. I had an anxiety attack in my mathematics class yesterday and no one seemed to bother nor care. I broke down in science and stayed in the science room all lunch while the teacher tried comforting me. After talking to the school counselor for probably the millionth time since I've been to the school, she "promised" to get me some help, yet again. Of course, when I came to talk to her today, she was "too busy" to talk to me. 

So, now I'm feeling worse about myself and everything and I don't think things are going to get better. After all, no one seems to give a shit about me. This isn't a cry for sympathy or anything, I think I should really tell you why I'm not updating. I know you guys probably don't care about me as a person and just want to read some CP love (I'm not judging), but I want you guys to know that I truly care about each and everyone of you. Sorry for the lack of updates, sorry for not being good enough; sorry for being a bother. 

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