Close To You// Roman Reigns| Rihanna [COMPLETE]

Chapter 55

"And have me miss the show?" I smiled as I watched him move, his muscles flexing with each flip , sending all kinds of feelings through my sore body.

I sat on the stool at the island and watched him as it definitely was an amazing view .

"I know its a weird thing to ask but what made you.." I glanced up at him as he threw some more batter into the pan.

" Uhm what made you realize that you loved me?" He hesitantly asked and I guess I should have expected the question to pop up soon.

All these years I hadn't felt the way about anyone ,I didn't know why it was him but I was happy it was.

"After our fight and making up that night I don't know I just realized something , I couldn't explain it I just didn't want to be without you. I guess I have been feeling it for awhile but I had simply been ignoring it or not wanting to feel it. Yes I was happy with you more than I have been for years or even with Chris but I figured if I were to go to the next step I needed to fully be secure in all aspects of myself in my life."

He set everything in different bowls and on plates before moving to me ,as he had stood on the other side of the counter, focusing on me fully.

"So I'm guessing you are now?" He whispered as he stood between my legs and I stared up into his eyes but quickly stared at his tattoo marking his chest.

"I called my dad up , had him flown out here and I spoke to him. Told him about all the bottled up hurt I had been feeling for so many years since I was as young as I could remember, all the fears trapped within me because of what he did to my mom. He hurt my mom. I'm sure you heard about that , I had been very open earlier in my career.."

He nodded slowly , "..he never hurt me though, yeah he probably raised his voice a few times but he was my father in the end. He had been a good father regardless and I refused to see it because I didn't understand how a man could be a good father but a bad husband you know? I had this hate for him for so many years building up and up and then the Chris incident happened and it was the final straw .
I believed I was drawn to those kinds of men even though Chris was the first, I saw it as my possible future so I kept guys at arms length. People believed I let them in , they liked to brag but I never really did. Even with Drake we would hang out while he fell, I just saw it as friends hanging out"

I smiled slightly as he wiped my cheeks where the tears had fallen.

"So many years and I could never give myself fully to a man. Even with Chris I hadn't given all of me I only realized it once I felt these things for you. Things I could not explain to myself. With Chris if I saw him with a woman I would get jealous yes but I was meant to as his girlfriend, I never felt afraid of losing him though. But with you I saw that pictures with Galina and I just felt these feelings accompanying the jealousy.
I felt insecure , vulnerable and afraid that I would lose you. I knew I felt so much more for you but did I know I loved you then? No but I'm sure I did.
I was just too blind to recognize it or confused because we haven't been together that long but I realized the time didn't matter at all . I just needed to fully let go of the hate. And clear my heart of it so I could honestly analyze it all and.." I croaked which caused him to move closer.