"This is my Hatred." (Discontinued)

"This is my Hatred."

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Writing, pen drenched in pure tainted black tint, elegantly danced to form a pattern on a piece of parchment. Instead of letters, they were symbols, symbols long forgotten by the people of the Leaf but never, ever to a Mother who taught her the knowledge of her people and the only thing she's best at, enabling herself to passed down—

"The Language of Haru"

Passing down to a daughter stripped down of the knowledge their clansmen ought to teach their children in a young age.

Sakura's eyes glowed a calm green under the moonlit state, by the table as her hand gripped the pen while holding the parchment in place she skillfully drew symbols, her symbol of emotions, the feelings she cannot write in words. Who would've thought, that a day will come where she'll finally able to put into use. In such an occasion where, her doubts clouded the foundations, the confines of the village she grew up.

"I do not truly, really hate something, not one particular thing nor an object I believe...I mean with all my heart that to allow myself to dislike isn't entirely a sin but I do know for certain that between dislike and hate are different right?"

Her fingers loosened their grip, hesitant even as she realize what she wrote or more specifically the write word was to draw these peculiar symbols. A part of her wanted to stop, cast aside to rip this piece of parchment. That these symbols were nothing but a mere piece, filled with feelings she shouldn't associate herself. Another part of her refused, it urges her to continue, one more, pour everything she needs to for enough is enough.

Sakura gulped, throat beginning to dry, parched from the need of thirst after an evening weep. Still, it urges her, encouraged her all the more. Yes, she sighs gravely, dry lips parted followed by a breathe of sigh.

Draw, draw, her mind pushed her to move her finger.

"Hatred is a powerful emotion to a human being."

That's right. A sentence formed, a bit more. Her eyes furrowed in concentration, sweat dripped from her brow all the way down to the paper. Funny really, she expected tears instead of the efforts she put into. Though, she thinks grimly to her self as a scowl became apparent that her tears ran dry to spill some more.

Her movement ascended to a more vigorous yet elegance grace, swiftly like that of a painter, one stroke then a high end she drew an impending encore to a masterpiece.

"A care free girl, filled with innocence, a person who do not know what outside world despite of being a Shinobi, I have denied what I dreamt of. For among the nature of our world, a Shinobi too is a partaker and the giving of losing one's an innocence right?"

"As  I do not expect I have retained my innocence, nor the other to expect I have yet to retain."

"So...what is my point you say?"

She bit her lips, shakily she prevents herself from stopping what she has already started. Sakura has gone so, so far, what more can she erased what has been drawn? Enough! With fruited teeth, an intense anger shot through her veins prompting her to zealously finished what she started.

"The point is, I have sunken so low to let the other know how their thoughts describe me as someone weak, unable to defend, and to not even care about myself. I have allowed myself to be morphed into someone who built herself in pillars of lies and deceit."

"A heart shattered to pieces like mirror..."

"And to the now of prevalence that I have remained in my Hatred."

"This is my Hatred."
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[Edited & Re-written: Sept. 2, 2019]