It's all my fault

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I left her alone sitting on black sofa in the livingroom and went to my bedroom. I closed the door louder than I wanted. Fortunatelly Angelo didn't wake up. I got undressed and hit the bed. I started crying. At first quietly, but it was getting harder and harder. I should have told her. If she told the police that I was raped, it doesn't matter anymore if I tell her that Jake said that he'd hurt her. I thought. Somebody knocked to the door.
Go away. I said. She entered to the room anyway. I turned around because I didn't want her to see me crying but she already knew that. She sat next to me and touched my arm. I pushed her away.
What's going on, honey? She whispered and touched my arm again.
I wish I could tell you. I answered while crying my eyes out. I sat down and laid my head on her shoulder. I've never felt that safe with somebody. I knew I could do everything for her. I'd kill myself. I'd go into fire for her. I'd die for her. Everything. I'd be able to do all of these things but I still couldn't protect her from Jake.
So tell me. I'm worried about you. You keep looking around, you are anxious, you're shaking. Even if you smile, it's fake all the time. I want to help you. I know that and you know that. She whispered.
It's about Jake. I said between tears.
What? She didn't understand.
He said... He said... I couldn't finish.
What did he say?
He knows that you know that he raped me. And he said that if you told somebody, you'd be hurt. He wants to hurt you, Delly. I couldn't just tell you. You're in danger. I'm... I'm just so sorry. It's all my fault. If I didn't meet you, it all wouldn't happened. When I said it I felt a huge relief. It's all my fault. I'm sorry. I repeated. I'd do everything for you. But it's too much. He is much stronger than me and he has friends that could help him to hurt you. I whispered.
Shh, babygirl. It's not your fault. You've done nothing wrong. It's his fault because he is the one who raped you. He's the only one person who should be sorry.
But he's not. Are you angry with me? I asked anxiously.
No, babe, I'm not. And don't be sorry. Everything is gonna be ok. I'll make things right.
Suddenly I felt really sleepy. I was trying not to sleep but I just couldn't fight it.
The last one thing that I saw before I fell asleep was Delly's face. It's the best way of falling asleep. I thought and then my eyes closed.

Short and shity chapter but I don't have time for writing this weekend and I'm so sorry about that. Hope you enjoy it. I'll try to update one more chapter today. Wish me luck! 😂👌
Always yours,
Alice xoxo

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