Those Brunette Boys

Chapter 17 - Jinx

Sage Dunwoody

I took a deep breath, my mom patting me on the back and urging me to open the door. She gave me a warm smile. I was proud of her. It seemed like her sanity was finally coming back.

At least I thought it did.

Immediately after I opened the door, she shoved me aside. I gave her a "bitch you did not" look with my jaw dropped down to the floor.

She grabbed one of Kye's hands, dragging him inside our house. His eyes were wide with shock, and maybe a hint of fear. He looked at me and gave me a scared look, stumbling along with my mom.

Mom sat him down on one of our beige couches. He sat as stiff as a paralyzed squirrel. Probably not the best simile, but I felt like it worked with the situation. Don't question my ways. Kye's hands were clasped together in his lap, his back straight. I saw his Adam's apple bob up and down as he gulped.

Oh, boy.

"So you're her man?"

Initiate ultimate cringe and embarrassment session.

"U-uh..." Kye stuttered, not knowing what to say. "N-no?"

"NO!" my mother gasped, slapping her hand over her chest for extra drama. I face palmed.

"Yeah," I came in. "It's our first date..."

She gasped again, a smile washing over her face and twinkle glimmering in her forest green eyes. Her eyes darted back and forth between a nervous Kye and me, her nearly humiliated daughter. Notice how I say nearly humiliated. There's only one thing that she could do to make this even worse.

She cupped her hands in her face, beginning to laugh with joy. "You two! Are just! Ugh!" she exclaimed happily, fangirling like a 14 year old girl.

Sorry, that was an offense to 14 year olds.

Then, she clamped her eyes shut, preparing herself for the unspeakable. Hoe don't do it, I thought to myself, trying to believe she would't reach this level of embarrassment.

But she did it. She squealed.

Oh my god.

I wanted to shrivel up and die right there and then.

And that concludes this episode of: Sage's Mother Humiliating Her! Tune in next time to see how she's back at it again worse than the white Vans!

-

He was laughing incessantly, and the blush still didn't fail to stain my cheeks. First, he was laughing at me for walking in on that couple, now for my shameless mother. What's next? It seemed like my life was an unfortunate series of events when it came to Kye knowing stuff about me.

Might as well make a book.

"Damn," he whistled, still laughing but not as much as before, "I was so scared. I thought she was gonna interrogate me and stuff. But nooo, not your mother. She just-"

Please don't repeat it.

"-gave me a bag full of protection."

I groaned and slid my hands down my face, blushing even harder when Kye began to howl with laughter again. He was never going to let me down about this. Why, Mother. Why must you do this to me?

I glanced behind me at the backseat, eyeing the bag full of condoms, lubricant, and those pills you take after having unprotected sex. It was repulsive knowing she had set up a bag for me for this specific reason. She seriously couldn't have done this on, I don't know, my wedding day? Not my first date with a guy?