Divorced (LGBTQ Story)

Divorced ch.16

Have you ever regretted not saying something to another person? But when you have the courage to, it was too late, then you feel bad and kick yourself in the ass for it...

Well at this moment, that's how I felt....

I sat in the most uncomfortable chair my ass ever made contact with, in a cold room that made me want to wear a heavy snow suit even if it's just the middle of fall, and was surrounded by sickly individuals that made me cringe every time they cough out their lungs.

This morning, I was packing up my stuff to leave this boring state. I was so close to walking out the hotel door when I've received a phone call from Danielle; saying that our father had another seizure that pushed him into a deep coma. I did not exactly drop everything and rushed to the hospital. After receiving the tragic news, I sat in my car and thought everything over.

Our father was- is so close to meeting death himself and the last words I said to him was basically stating he's the worst father in the world. My chest ached from realizing I went against the rules of God by disrespecting my own father. I'm truly going to hell now.... If I was not going for turning against the Adam and Eve rule.

The sad thing about it is, I don't feel bad for his misfortune. Yeah, I'm a little hurt to hear he's in a coma; who wouldn't be hurt- I'm his flesh and blood. Without my father pushing me to do better, I would of never became a writer.

Rubbing my hands down my face, I huffed in frustration. I've been sitting in this hall for the past thirty minutes, the doctor told us we can go inside the room to see him; Danielle and our mother went inside with no problem, I on the other hand, does not have the courage to see our father's motionless body. I didn't want that to be the last thing I remember my own father by; which is probably a good idea instead of remember him yelling at me. Still, I couldn't force myself to walk in that room.

Soon, probably five minutes later, Danielle and our mother walked out the room and stood against the wall with sad faces. "I'm sorry." I mumbled, mainly to our mother who was now looking at me like I was the devils spawn.

"You're sorry?" She said as if she had poison in her mouth. Her eyes immediately became glossy from the tears that threatened to come out. "Sorry? That's all you have to say?"

I opened up my mouth to speak, but no words came out. Was I actually sorry? Or am I just lying to make everything right?... "I-yes. Máma, I di-"

"Don't," my mother stopped me from speaking anymore as she stuck out her nose as if she's too good to speak to me. "I don't want to hear it Skyler. You've disappointed this family far enough, not only that, but you disrespected your father. I did not raise you to act like this-"

"You hardy raised me at all." I blurted out, not able to hold back anymore.

Danielle gave me wary look, as if she was telling me to not keep going. "Skyler, let's not start this again. Please, we're here for mom and she needs us-"

"I tried my best to make sure you have a good life," our mother spoke up, completely cutting off Danielle's short speech about being their for our mother. "I've been there for you and Danielle."

While rolling my eyes, I stood to my feet so I can add a couple more feet to the short space. "Letting dad push us around is not being there. Flashing and bragging about something we hate to do is not being there. Having your husband verbally abuse us is not being there. Having our nanny take your place in parent and teachers night is not being there. Being there is when you encourage your kids to be what they want to be, helping them, protecting them, being on their side, understanding their ways even though it's hard! That's being there." My little speech caused mostly every eye to turn to me like o was going to explode any second.