Chapter 18 - Messy

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"Don't think about it that way."

"Louis, you can't just date someone and then fool around with someone else."

Even though I want this so bad, I know it isn't right. No one deserves the pain of being cheated on, not even Eleanor.

"But Harry, you're more to me than someone I'm fooling around with. I care about you." Louis stated.

"I know that, I guess I just need to think about this."

"I thought you were okay with this."

"And I thought you and her were on a break. It's a bit different now." I admitted. The guilt was just catching up with me. I had my chance with him, and he's back with Eleanor. Maybe that's all it was meant to be. Doing it behind Eleanor's back isn't what I want, even though I want Louis. That's wrong.

"Well, if you're uncomfortable then we should stop." Louis said.

"I should probably go." I said, getting off the couch.

"Okay," he said, just watching me. He looked upset, but I knew I was doing the right thing. If this really effected him, then he would break up with Eleanor and choose me. But we all know that's not happening. So this is it.

I walked out of his house, and when I shut the door I felt a little bit of regret. I really wanted Louis, and I had him. But I didn't have him to myself. I would just end up getting hurt.

I started to walk home, it wasn't that far, but farther than I would like to walk. I'm pretty lazy. It gave me a lot of time to think. Why does Louis find cheating okay? I mean he did say sort of when I asked if they were back together, but the answer should be no if he's fooling around with other people. What if I wasn't the only person he's been fooling around with? What if Louis has been with a lot of people before? And why did I let myself fall deeper for him when I knew this would happen?

Suddenly, I felt a need to share my thoughts. I couldn't just keep them to myself, or I would go mad. I reached into my pocket for my phone only to discover it wasn't there.

Oh shit.

* * *

Louis' POV

I was disappointed that Harry left. I was really having a great time with him. And I am really tired of something interrupting us from going farther than kissing. I can't get the image of that kid on me out of my damn head. I was just hoping this wasn't completely the end for us. Maybe Harry was right, I should figure things out before I go around kissing other people.

I was about to go to my room, when I noticed something on the couch. Harry left his phone here.

I really want to see what kind of stuff Harry has on his phone. But would that be wrong?

Well, there's nothing wrong with seeing if there's a password on it. I hit the home button, and his lock screen popped up. It was a picture of Deadpool. What a nerd. I swiped to the right, and it unlocked.

Harry is dumb enough to leave his phone without a password, I'm going through it. I bet when I give him his phone back he'll put a password on it.

Was it wrong to go through his messages? Nah, let's see what he says about me.

The last conversation he'd opened was with Liam. I bet Liam talks shit about me all the time. I know he thinks I treat Harry poorly, that's probably all that he talks about. I started to read them, and realized who they were about.

 I started to read them, and realized who they were about

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I kiss Harry, I have a girlfriend, I'm the one he likes. I didn't know he felt so deeply for me. I thought this was just an average high school crush. I didn't realize what I was doing to him. I had some thinking to do.

* * *

I decided that Harry would most likely freak out if I told him I went through his phone, so I would just give it back and leave that part out. I can't believe he feels like he loves me. It's just bizarre to me that someone I've never really thought of dating could feel that for me. I felt bad that I didn't realize how many feelings Harry had for me, and I've just been flaunting Eleanor in his face like it's no big deal. Now I understood why he left earlier.

I was now parked outside of his house, with his phone in my hand. If he's anything like me he would want his phone back as soon as possible. I got out of the car, and walked up to his front door. I knocked twice, and waited for someone to answer.

The door opened up, and his mom stood in the doorway.

"Hi, Louis! What are you doing here?"

"Harry left his phone at my house this morning."

"Oh, he's up in his room, you can go give it to him." she said with a smile, and let me in.

"Thank you," I said, as I walked to the stairs. I climbed up them, and Harry's door was closed. I could hear music playing inside. I knocked on the door a few times.

"Come in, mom." he shouted, turning his music down.

I opened the door, he was laying on his bed with his laptop in front of him.

"I brought something for you," I said, pulling his phone out of my pocket. He moved his laptop off of his lap, and onto his bed. He got up, and grabbed it out of my hands.

"Thank you for bringing it to me." he said, setting it on his bedside table.

"Yeah, I know I can't go without my phone. I thought you might need yours." I said. "And I'm sorry about earlier."

"I don't really want to talk about it." Harry said, which made me frown. "I'm not good with talking about awkward things."

"Okay, well I just thought I should bring you your phone. I'll see you at school." I said, starting to feel the awkwardness.

He didn't say anything back as I left the room, and closed the door behind me. I headed downstairs, and Anne was just sitting on the couch.

"Heading out already?" she asked, and I nodded. "Well, it was nice seeing you again."

"It was nice to see you too." I said, with a smile, as I walked out the front door.


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SORRY THIS CHAPTER IS A MESS

But you will see what will happen after this ;)

comment if you think it was wrong or not for Louis to read those texts....

See you next chapter

-Amanda Styles [6-5-16]

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