Bittersweet

17

"Please, Esme? We need to forget everything that's happened because if we don't, we'll just throw it back in each others faces when ever one of us gets mad. I know with a lot of time, we can be friends." He adds, trying to catch my eyes but I keep them glued to the pavement.

"Do you...you still don't remember anything from that night, right?" I ask, worriedly. "Because I know I don't."

"Not a damn thing." He laughs. "But hey, it isn't out fault, am I right?"

So he doesn't know what type of second chance he asked for that night. He doesn't know that he told me that I was this magnificent girl or anything.

"Yes, I think a second chance is a good thing for us too." I nod, still racking my brain around about the small memory I gained.

"Great! So forget about everything; from that kissing booth, to my trail, everything."

The kissing booth? Your trail? Some of the most memorable times in my teenaged life? When I anticipated being wrapped up in your arms for the first time in what seemed like years? Our first kiss during the carnival? Our private prom you put so much thought in to?

Everything?

"Niall, we gotta go, we need to find Ryan." Gavin says to him with a hand on his shoulder to lead him away from me.

"Okay, see you later person I don't know!" He calls over to me with a smile. I send him a fake one in return before going back to staring at the pavement.

How was this so easy for him to do? To forget everything we've been through? Oh right, his fiancé doesn't know any of that. Now it explains it, he doesn't want a second chance, no, he wants me to keep my mouth shut about our past. And to think I was actually going to believe him.

"Esme darling, you shouldn't be here! You should be with the happy couple, lining up to go into the reception!" Phoebe sings, pulling me by the arm to a doorway before literally running off after.

"Hello happy couple! I was told to be here with you! So I can walk in to the reception like a marching band!" I mimic Phoebe's high pitched singing voice as I walk past the other people in the bridal party. "Esme, you're drunk, go home." Ryan, who happens to be with Gavin and Niall, says.

"But we finally get to dance down some sort of isle." I fake a pout and he laughs hard before pulling me by my shoulder just in time to be shoved out by Phoebe.

"And now for the lovely, Mr. and Mrs. Malik!" Some guy, whom I don't think I've met yells into a mic and out comes my two best friends with cheesy smiles. Even Zayn who usually pouts even during happy moments. Weirdo.

The song they chose, one by Rascal Flats, begins and the two take the dance floor as everyone watches in awe. Fuck, they're married, actually married. This is just yet another wake up call that I have to grow up and continue with my life. Niall was right, a second chance is something we both needed.

"Go on and dance!" Phoebe scolds me and I realize I'm the only bridal party member who isn't slow dancing. Even Ryan ditched me for one of Fin's young hot cousins.

Oh, okay Phoebe, I'll slow dance with myself.

"Come on." Harry says sounding exasperated as he pulls my hand, dragging us out in the open. "Why are we always dance partners?" I giggle when I wrap my arms around his neck.

"It's a sign, I swear it." He grins, surprising me by kissing my forehead."Fate wants us to be together."

My heart sinks to my toes at the thought. It always made me nervous, the idea of Harry and I being more than friends, it never had a good outcome. Oddly enough, I glance to Niall who was twirling Emma and laughing with love filled eyes. Like I said, I need to grow up and move on with my life.

"Too bad you're across the country." I look back at him, admiring his beautiful blue-green eyes. I loved when they were in the midst of changing colors because the way they clashed made them unique.

"Actually, I'm in the middle of moving to New York. I have been for awhile and I was planning on telling everyone later, but I still have stuff to do in California so it'll be awhile I think."

"Really?" I ask with pure shock. He's really coming back? Is this meant to be a sign? Why am I questioning everything?

He lightly chuckles, sucking in his lips, when he says, "Yeah, I felt pretty left out being the only one so far away. Liam's almost done with school and the only one is Jack who's a real dick for not coming."

"You know he wanted to be here, but he's on a sports scholarship and he can't risk it. I'm just surprised my parents are finally in the same room in like three years." I look over to see my mom with Fin's mom looking like a reck with those handkerchiefs, wiping the tears away. Then my dad who was at the bar, chatting with a few other guys, one of them I think is Zayn's uncle.

"I'm proud of them too. I think we've all come a long way since high school, you know?" He tells me when the song ends and the dance floor clears.

I'd like to think I have, but truthfully, I haven't. After reuniting with everyone, I realized I'm still like the teenage version of myself, just with shorter hair. But I need to get past the past.

"Esme, the games have begun!" Matt winks at me when Louis sets a glass of vodka in front of me before sitting down. Damn. I almost forgot the drinking game we said we'd do. The first person to throw up, looses, and the loser has to carry back the other two suitcases.

"Bring it Smithy and Tommo." I shrug as if no big deal, quickly downing the glass and water right after. The table erupted with laughter at my facial expression when the burning sensation hit me and I couldn't help but crack a smile too.


*

"Taylor, I'm gonna go...I'm gonna uh, pee! Yeah, pee." I slur, leaving my friend's side to find the bathroom. Thank God for the neon signs or it would've taken me hours to find it.

"I really don't believe that-"

Two heads shoot over at me and I recognize it as Emma and Harry; Emma oddly close to Harry's chest. It hit me that after dinner, I hadn't seen either of them. Niall was already shit faced with West and Liam, so I had thought Emma was too. Was Emma even a drinker? I knew Harry was, but he looked pretty sober, as I, was just overly tipsy. It would tail more than a few glasses of vodka to get this girl drunk.

Harry quickly pushed Emma away from him and gave me a worried expression. "Do you need help?"

"Nah, I'm not drunk." I sigh, ruining my perfect hair by running my fingers through it. Luckily we had already taken pictures so I didn't have to worry about my appearance anymore. "Yet, anyways."

He swore ever so lightly and grabbed my wrist.

"What do you remember from the last five minutes?"

"Well I was dancing with Taylor, then I went to find the bathroom, saw Emma kiss you and you pulling away-"

"No! Esme no, she did not kiss me." He cuts me off and shakes me by my shoulder. "What, you think you can hypnotize her to make her forget?" I hear Emma snort. Very unEmma like might I add. It was like she wasn't the perfect angel we'd all known her to be.

"She does forget when you ask her too, but she needs to be really wasted to do so." He states, handing me his glass. Unintentionally, I spill it on the floor and drop the glass.

"Where's Niall? He needs to know." I blurt out, spinning around on my bare heels. Where's I leave my shoes again? "Know what?" Harry asks, facing me. "That you...you....er...you um...wait, what was it?" I mumble, thinking hard.

"And that's how you trick stupid people." Emma laughs.

"Will you shut up?" Harry grits through his teeth. "God damn you are just so irritating, I don't know why I got myself in this mess!"

"Because you're just a kind hearted man." Her mood lightens. "Oh yes! And you want Esme for yourself and I want her as far away from Niall as possible."

"I shouldn't have told you shit, I regret it all now." Harry whispers with annoyance before taking my hand and lugging me away.

"What'd you tell her? What's going on? Why doesn't she want me near Matt?" Matt, why him? Wait, that's what she said, right...

"Oh we need to get you to bed." Harry says, pulling me closer to him when we reach outside. I hated this; these secrets. They only ever led to no good. If only I had the capacity to walk on my own.

We manage to make it inside the main house and up the stairs, in to his empty room he shared with Liam. Harry finally lets me go and I take a seat on my bed as he removes his suit jacket and tosses it in the chair. He disappears into a closet before coming back out with one of his white t-shirts.

"Can you manage getting dressed?" He looks amused as I sway back and forth like a mental patient. "Yea, if you unzip me." I manage to say, getting up and facing away from him with my hair in my hands. I felt relief as the dress loosened from me and I held it up with one hand, so it wouldn't fall. My head didn't feel as light as before which was a good sign that I was sobering up.

"Look away."

He smirks but turns his body to face the door as I allowed the rose oink garment to fall and quickly I slid his big t-shirt on. "Okay, I'm done."

When he turns back around he looks weirdly pleased but I ignore his behavior and find a hanger for my dress. Fin would kill me if I just left it on the floor like that.

"I'm fine now even though things are still hazed. I'll just head back to my room and call it a night." I announce loudly enough for him to hear me from the bathroom he was in. "You can go back to the reception."

"I'm not leaving you here alone." Harry muffles as he emerges shirtless and only in his boxers. "Are you crazy?"

Wow he looked good. No Esme, you're still drunk, remember that.

"Whatever floats your boat, I'm going to my room, goodnight." I say flatly, trying not to stare as I walk around him and out the door. The hallways were dimmed and it was frankly scary being alone. I should've stayed with Harry, especially knowing how much of a scaredy cat I was. No, I'll be fine by myself.

My door creaks open and I hurriedly search for the light in the room, then searching every nook and cranny for any possible creature. Hey, it was necessary.

"Find the ghost yet?"

My heart jumps and I look towards the door to see Harry leaning against it, smiling. I roll my eyes and flip him off before throwing the decorative pillows from my bed, on the floor.

"You can go Harry, I don't need you." I lie, pulling the blanket around me. No, no, no, I do need you, I'm just too childish to admit it.

As though reading my mind he chuckles and closes the door behind him before sitting at the edge of the bed without a word. I sigh and sit myself up so I was closer to him.

"You're still drunk, right?" He questions in a small voice, pushing back a section of my hair behind my ear as I nod. I wasn't sure if it was true or not and I'm sure he felt the same way. Usually I'm giggling and saying crazy stuff that people find entertaining, but I'm oddly calm.

"Esme, I'm in love with you."

-

His words hit me hard and I give him a weird look.

"A second chance? I second chance of what, dumbass?" I laugh at Niall who struggles to sit up.

"Of us, Esme. How can't you see that I'm still in love with you and I've never stopped. I don't care if you're passed us, I need you to know. I need some closure before I marry Emma. I love Emma, yes, but not the way I love you."

Love? What? I'm dreaming, aren't I. Whatever was in that alcohol drugged is both into this state of mind, that's it. Maybe he's going crazy? Maybe I am? This is all a figment of my imagination and that's the only explanation.

"Esme, say something, anything."

-


"And before you say anything, before you say you've known that I was already, I need you to hear me out. I need you to know that I have been for years, even before we officially met. Believe it or not, I tried to get Matt to hook us up back in eleventh grade, before Chloe, but he had said you had a thing for someone else. Little did I know that someone was one of my best friends and team mate. Now I know I'll never get the love you have for him, but maybe, just maybe, we can give it a try? I mean, we have before and now this time there's nothing standing in our way, right?"

This was it. This is how Esme Rose Harris dies. It was all too much. My head was spinning and my heart beat had picked up. I'm pretty sure I was sweating bullets and I was just about to pass out before Jett bursted through the door.

"We need help carrying Taylor, Fin and Niall up." He says to Harry who looks back and forth at us. Reluctantly he gets up and follows Jett out, closing the door behind him just when adrenaline kicked in. I scrabble to get up, opening my suitcase and tossing all of my belongings in it before switching into clothes of my own. Finding my passport and putting it into my purse I thrust my suitcase on the floor, before rolling it behind me out of the room.

I heard laughter coming from the grand suite that the married couple occupied and it was the perfect escape. Not caring, I rush down as fast as possible to the front door and stopping one of Zayn's cousins.

"Can you give me a ride to the airport, please?"



(A/N: I know I'm a horrible person but one word; school. As of this moment I'm not in any math class which is mandatory for my graduation, but that's okay, right?

N O T!

My school is utter bullshit and I won't sit here and complain or beg for your forgiveness bc that's too much.

But hey, I realized the group of friends I created in these stories are the ones I have in real life. Like I have my own Fin, Zayn, Matt, Louis, Taylor and Liam. NOW I JUST NEED A HARRY AND NIALL AND MY LIFE WILL BE COMPLETE.

won't give a possible update date cause I suck lol.

Tell me what ya think now that there's lots of drama (; & vote wise you're at it!!!

Love you guys if you're still reading lol, ox, Dee)