Even Broken People Need Love

1

"I love you," I whispered in his ear. We were on our one year anniversary at the beach. It's so amazing and beautiful. The sun was shining. I've never felt so happy.

"I love you more Jessica." He said, kissing my ear, then making his way down my neck, nibbling and licking. I felt the warmth throughout my entire body. I loved his touch. It make me so happy and feel safe. As he got to my favorite spot, I let out a slight moan.

"Aust-Austin, not here." I said huskily. He smiled cheekily, knowing the effect he had on me. "This is not funny." I huffed as we started walking back to his beautiful cherry 2015 Jeep. He held my hand as we started our way home. I was starting to wander into a sleep when I heard a loud scream.  I quickly opened my eyes, and I saw a huge pickup truck coming at us. It was closer to my side, Austin jumped onto me, taking the blow. I heard the sound of glass breaking and a pained shout. I felt the glass shred my skin, but nothing was more painful that the breaking in my heart as I felt Austin's body fall limp. I felt tired, my eyes slowly closed. And then that's all I remembered.

*-*-*-*

I woke up with a pounding headache. Everything was white, and bright. I just wanted to go back to sleep. But then the door burst open and people in white came running in. Everyone screaming "She's awake! She's awake! Call the family in!" I knew I was awake, where was my family? Where was Austin? Why am I in so much pain? What the hell happened? "Ma'am, do you know your name?"

"Jessica White." I said, sounding very weak.

One lady handed me water. "What do you remember sweetie?"

"I remember being on a date with Austin, my boyfriend. Where's Austin? Where am I?" I said all in one breathe, it was hurting to talk, and my lungs needed more oxygen!

"You're in the hospital, I'm Annie, and you were in a car crash. Austin..." Annie looked at the doctor, who looked cold, but nodded, saying something with his eyes. Annie must have understood it, turning back to me with soft blue eyes, almost like Austins eyes. "Austin didn't make it through the car crash." That's all it took. My heart shattered, and tears flew from my eyes. I couldn't stop. I heard my family come in. This was the one time I didn't care if they saw me cry. The pain in my body didn't compare to the plain in my heart. I wanted Austin. He's the only one who made me feel like this. He made my heart race, my legs hurt, my everything happy. He was my entire world and he died protecting me. I love him. Why did he do this? Why did he leave me? Why couldn't I just die? I would be better than the pain in my heart that's here right now.

"Jess... I'm so sorry." My brother came over to try and calm me down. My twin, he was very close to me. Jase White. Had the same dark hair as me, that we got from my father. Hayden White. He married my beautiful mother, Emily White. She's so amazing, with a past like hers, she's so mentally strong and so beautiful inside out. I loved both my parents, but I was very close with Jase. He was like my rock. "I'm so glad Austin did that. I'd be lost without my sister." Jase let a small tear fall down his cheek. I lifted my arm and wiped it away.

"Thanks Jase, I love you." I said, pulling him into a hug. His hugs are the best too. He makes me happy, but Austin was amazing.

"Dad!" I cried as Jase went over to console my weeping mother. My dad already had my mothers tears all over his shoulder.

"Jessy!" He hugged me tight. "I love you sweet heart. I'm sorry about Austin, but man did he earn my respect. Protecting my baby girl like that? He can have all my respect. He lived a great life!"

"But Austin is my best friend!" I blubbered.

"Emily, wanna take this one?"

"Hey sweetie. Austins in a good place, okay? His time here was served. He made an amazing girl, very happy for a very long time. It was just his time, okay? He loved you very much and will watch over you and make sure your happy okay?" I hated this. I just wanted Austin to come bursting into the door and in his sexy voice, just say it was all a joke, and I just want him to be okay, and we can laugh about this when we have children.

"When am I getting out?" I asked. I wanted to be alone, and not constantly on watch.

"In about a day or two." My mom told me. I groaned, I just wanted to be at home in my bed.

"Can I be let out any earlier?"

"I'd have to check with your nurse, and doctor, but I can try if you want..." My dad now said.

"Please?" I gave my best puppy dog eyes. And then my dad left to go to talk to doctor.

*-*-*-*

"Its nice to be home." I said, a day later. They wouldn't let me out early but at least I'm home.

"You should rest, Jess." Jase said, kissing my forehead and leaving me in my room alone. I didn't have many injuries, because Austins body protected me. Tears immediately sprang to my eyes. I can't believe he's gone. Its killing me. I miss him so much, it kills me to not hear his silly laugh, or see his knee falling smile. I miss him. I cried for the rest of the day. For the rest of the week. I cried for a long time. I cried loudly, I cried with no tears, but I still couldn't get the pain to stop. All I wanted was for it to be gone, and never come back. I wanted it all to go far away.

I would say I'm okay, but I'm tired of lying.