You're Different From Everyone Else Here - Thomas - The Maze Runner

Alby.

"No, Syd, you can't think like that," Tom says.

"Tom. Why didn't you tell me sooner? Why didn't someone tell me that during the like 14 hours I was out, you were going through the changing!"

"We didn't want you to worry. God, I shouldn't have told you," he says, pacing around nervously.

"Yes, you should have! Have the other gladers thought about this?"

"I don't know!"

"We've got to go. We're going to talk to them," I say, grabbing another piece of the jerky before walking back to my room. I eat it on the way and when I get there, I change into jeans and a long sleeve shirt. I brush out my hair and finally take off the slight makeup I've had on since Gally. It was smeared and smushed and terrifying. I replace it with a little more and brush my teeth before walking back to the map room and finding Tom. We walk to the cafeteria to find Newt, Minho, Teresa, and Chuck nowhere to be found. I ask Frypan.

"Frypan!" I call. He jogs over to me.

"Have you seen Newt?" I ask. He shakes his head. "Minho? Teresa? Chuck?" All no's. "What about Alby?" He shakes his head.

"Why the sudden spring back?"

"What?"

"No ones seen you for 36 hours and suddenly you come back out acting normally,"

"Yeah. Sorry I needed some time to myself after being fucking attacked! I was almost killed, dumbass!" I snap. The room falls silent. I look around at all the shocked gladers and rush out. I leave Tom, and just run to the medstand. No tunnels. Just sprinting for it. I couldn't handle their stares. Those glares. All the eyes that fell on me. That watched the mistake.

I was dizzy. My vision blurred and I barely made it to the building before collapsing to my knees. I was that desperate to get away from everyone. I let the tears overwhelm me. I pull myself on one of the beds and burry my face in the pillow. The rough fabric didn't feel great, but I just needed to squeeze and hold on to something stable. It was like I could feel the world spinning. I need security. I wanted to go back to those day where it was only Newt, Alby, Minho and me. Where the glade was too much room for all of us, and too much work, but we made it work, and we had fun doing it.  A gentle hand lands on my back, scaring the crap out of me. I scream, and turn around. It was Newt. I try to catch my breath as he gives me a small smile and sits down next to me. I sit up and shuffle over next to him. He wraps his arm around me and pulls me to him, giving me the familiar comfort. I lean my weight against him as I regain my composure.

"Do you ever just wish we could go back to the early glade days?" I whisper.

"How early?"

"Almost as early as we can go. Just you, me, Alby and Minho,"

"Sometimes. It was a lot simpler. We didn't have to worry about 36 different kids, and we could almost relax. But those days were hard. We had to prepare for everyone and everything," I nod against his chest, and scoot closer.

"Has the griever come yet today?"

"Yeah.... We haven't told anyone. It, um, it took-" he says, before breaking off in a sob.

"Who? If it's Chuck, just don't even say it," I say, ready to cry again.

"No.... Not him. I-It to-ok A-Alby...!" He says, crying. The moment I heard him say the name I was crying, too.

"So, yeah, I wish we could go back to those days. But only because Alby was there," he says, tears falling off his face, a couple even falling onto me. Not Alby. Anyone but Alby. He was one of the first ones I met here. Tom comes in and Newt immediately wipes his eyes. I wipe mine, too, and sit up, but it doesn't help since another wave of sobs comes over me and I cry again, burying my face in Newt's shirt, latching onto him. Tom comes over and tries to help comfort me, but I just push him off. He didn't know Alby like we did. He couldn't help. He couldn't feel the amount of pain we did. He wouldn't understand.

Syd. Please at least tell me what happened. I want to help. He says.

Alby.... He..... is all I can think before crying harder. He was really gone. Newt holds me to him and I feel one of his tears hit my head.

Tom. Can we just be alone? You wouldn't get it. I say. He sighs and gently rubs a circle in my back before walking into the tunnels. I pull away from Newt gently, keeping close. I look up at him to see tears covering his cheeks, his eyes red and puffy.

"He's really gone.... I had hope after he had gotten stung. That he wouldn't change. But now, he's really gone. Never to be seen ag-g-gain!" I sob out the last word. He pulls me to his side and gently rubs my upper arm. My head was pounding so so hard.

"I know. You're the only one who would really get the pain I'm feeling right now. Ably. He was my best friend...."

"I k-know. Alby seemed like a hard ass from the outside but he was really a good guy. He didn't deserve this..." Newt held me closer and we sit there, tears dripping down both of our faces.

"Why him...?" I whisper. Newt kisses the side of my head.

"I don't know..." He whispers back, leaning his head on mine.

"So I guess you're the leader, now, Newt," I whisper.

"I think Tom's taken over. He leads all of them more than us..."

"What? What have I been missing?" I know I have been really spaced out lately. I knew the Alby situation wasn't going to help with that.

"Yeah. They look to him. I guess I don't have a purpose here anymore..."

"Newt. You can't be thinking like that again. I'm not going to fix another broken leg. And you do have a purpose. You're my best friend. I need you here. If you leave, too, I don't know what I would do without you. Please, please, don't leave me. Newt. Please,"

"Syd. I'm not going to leave. Or at least, I don't plan on it. But it's like I've already lost you. You're not strong like you used to be. You're not the sassy little firecracker who I lead the glade side-by-side with. I want my Syd back. I don't like seeing you like this..."

"It's hard, Newt. How can I stay strong after being attacked by Ben, being trapped in the maze, almost being eaten by a griever, being beaten by Gally, and now Alby....? How can I stay sassy and strong throughout that?!"

"I get it, Syd. And later we'll be able to recover. I just want my Syd back..." He says. He kisses my temple one more time.

"Maybe I want my Newt back. You just said about 20 things that sounded extremely like what you said before you got the limp!" I say. He hugs me, wrapping his arms tightly around me.

"As long as you're here with me, I'll never do that again. Just don't leave me, Syd," he says. I nod against his chest. He kisses my forehead.

"Let's go back to the homestead, Syd. I came here because I thought I needed to be alone, but I know I just needed a friend who understands what I was going through. Come on, Syd," he says, getting up. He wraps his arms around my shoulders and we walk back to the room, him limping beside me, is closer than ever.