Gotta Be You [Complete]

Chapter 47

He gestured towards the living room. “Would you like to sit?” 

All I did was nod before I walked into the living and sat down on the sofa. He took a seat beside me and rested his eyes on me. 

“What’d you want to talk about?”

I looked down at my hands placed on my lap, not being able to make eye contact with him. What I was about to ask him was making nervous.

“I’ve been doing a lot of thinking tonight, hence why I can’t sleep. And I’ve just thought about everything that’s happened, all the way from the beginning up until now. I feel like I have everything I need to know before I make my decision. Except one thing.”

I paused and let silence fill the air around us.

“And what would that be?” Harry said softly.

I finally built up the courage to look up at him. “The only memory I don’t remember and that I think plays a big role in my decision is…the time before we broke up and what led up to it.” 

His face remained expressionless as he continued to look into my eyes. He remained silent but looked like he was deep in thought. I decided to continue before I chickened out. 

“And I realized that I get my memories back when certain things happen that are similar to those memories. Like yesterday, when I passed out, it was actually because I got a memory back. It was the memory of Niall singing Gotta Be You to me from my front yard, just like he was doing at the restaurant.”

He looked away, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “So…you want the memory of us breaking up back so…you want to break up with me again right now?”

I mirrored his expression as my eyebrows scrunched together. “No, no. That’s not what I meant. I mean, I don’t think that’s the part that I want to remember. I think I need to remember the part of the end of our relationship.” 

“So how are you thinking of getting that memory back?” he asked, looking even more confused.

I took a deep breath and let a few seconds pass. “I was thinking that we could…kiss.” 

His eyes grew wide for a second as he looked at me, surprise written all over his face.

“But…we’ve kissed before. I mean, after the accident, after you lost your memory. Wouldn’t that trigger your memory back then?”

“I thought that, too, but back then all I knew what that I was in love with you. Now, I know the truth and I feel like it’ll be different. With Niall, I got memories of him back once I started getting suspicions about the two of us and then after I found out that we were actually together. And now that I know everything, I can’t think of any other way that I can get those memories back. I know it’s being selfish but I can’t think of any other way. I mean, you can say no and I’ll completely understand.”

I looked at him as he took in what I said. “But what if nothing happens?”

“Then there’s nothing else we can do and I’ll just have to make a decision based off of everything else that I know. I know that it’s horrible asking this of you, I mean, I’m basically using you. But--” 

“I’ll do it.”

I looked at him, shock filling me. I honestly thought that he would say no. I mean, if I kiss him and I get my memory back of the end of our relationship then that would be bad for Harry’s part. He would think that I would choose Niall over him knowing that I remember falling out of love with him. 

“Really?” 

All he did was nod. I could see sadness fill his eyes for just a second before he blinked it away.