Finding You

chapter 23

I watch Zay think about what I just told him. I hope he believes me.

"Permanent message? As in what?" he inquires.

"I don't know. I think he was going to kill me then. But he started to kiss my neck and-"

Zay interrupts me in fury. "Wait, what were his exact words before he kissed you?"

"He said something like, marking you would piss him off more. And that it'll give me pleasure. It didn't though."

I glance up at Zay. He's acting eerily calm, but underneath his gold eyes I see more hatred than I care to admit. His teeth grind together and he takes a deep breath.

"Did he...?"

He leaves the question unfinished. I don't know what he means, and I can tell that he doesn't want to finish it. But I have to ask. "Did he what?"

"Did he bite you? Anywhere?" he says quietly.

"No. He didn't hurt me. I don't even know what marking means. I'm untouched by him."

He sighs loudly. "No, you're not. You're scent.. I can smell him on you. It's driving me insane, really. He shouldn't ever be that close to you."

I curl up around him, in hope of surrounding him with my real smell. He rests his chin upon my shoulder and I breath him in.

Zay slowly pulls my hair from my neck and the place where Ryder kissed. He growls a deep, menacing growl that manages to sound sexy but chill me at the same time. "Amber. You have hickeys from him."

I reach towards my neck and try to feel them. Not having any luck, I drop my hand back down. "I tried to get away," I say.

"I'm not blaming you. It's all him."

The more he talks the more unstable he seems to get. He clenches his fists and his eyes flash. His breathing is rough, and I can't help but notice him lean away from me. "Zay?" I ask tentatively.

He takes a step away from me and doesn't make eye contact. "I want to kill him."

Zay hates this guy. There are the obvious reasons; for Ryder touching and threatening me. But underlying that, I see a deeper reason.

"This has to do with something else, doesn't it? More than just me?"

"The bigger reason is you. He's a cold-blooded murderer."

He keeps moving farther from me. I try to fill the space again but he distances himself quickly. It's so he won't hurt me, I know that. But space is the exact opposite of what I want right now. "Don't come closer," he says.

"Um, I'll do what I want."

"No! Stay away!" His outburst drives me all the more.

"No, Zyler. Shut up!" I yell right back.

He quiets and stares at me with an inhumane look. I tread carefully until I'm right in front of him again. My arms find his body and once we touch I can't imagine ever letting go.

I hold his face and try to relax him. "You're okay, Zyler. I'm here with you." I place my hand over his heart. "Focus on my voice, not him."

When he does, I feel it. Every single nerve in my body awakens when he grips my body fiercely and his eyes clear. A calm encloses us. I smile at him. This moment, right now, is perfect.

"I'm sorry. I can't do it," he says in a strained voice.

I kiss him softly. "Do what?"

His anger joins the air and is swept away with the wind. I'm left with his more playful side. "I can't stand the thought of anyone else touching you. Or marking you."