My Heart Goes Out To You, Captain | Levi X Reader ✓

Chapter 11: For our friends

Reader's pov:

It isn't the same. I feel like I've lost apart of myself. I walked back into my room and broke down. I can't believe that I lost my last physical memory of Scott and Lucinda. I buried my head in the pillow as I cried. I cried, until I fell asleep.

*Dream*

I was in a room and there were two chairs before me. The people sitting in the chairs had bags over their heads. I went and took them off to see Scott and Lucinda looking at me with sinister eyes.

"It's all your fault we're dead. Now it's all your fault that you lost your bracelet. Therefore you've lost our promise." They said in unison.

"NO! I will see the outside world for us if it's that last thing I do!" I yelled. They both burst out laughing like maniacs.

"Don't make us laugh." They said.

*Dream over*

I sat up abruptly and panted. This was normal though. I needed something to drink so, I went out to the mess hall. Having insomnia sucked ass. On a good night, I'd get around three hours sleep. But tonight I'm pretty sure I only got around two. When I got into the mess hall, I heard someone. I shyly entered and saw my captain sitting there drinking tea.

"What are you doing up, cadet?" He asked.

"Remember how I said I got nightmares? That's why." I said quietly.

"Wanna talk about it?" He asked. I nodded my head saying 'no'.

"I just came here for something to drink." I replied.

"Drink tea. It helps." He said and poured out another cup of tea for me. I sat down beside him and took a sip. It tasted really nice.

"Why are you up, captain?" I asked.

"Paperwork, also I don't sleep well anyway." He said. So he has insomnia too. Maybe that's why we're both so short.

"Well considering I don't sleep much too. Can I help you?" I asked.

"Whatever, brat." He said and we both got up and went into his office. He have me half of the massive stack of paper and a pen. I started working and so did Levi.

Within a few hours, we got the paperwork done. I stood up and went back to the captain with the completed paperwork.

"Let me know if you ever want help again, sir." I said happily.

"I will if you tell me about your nightmares." He said tonelessly. I nodded and sat down in front of him.

"I've been getting them ever since the wall fell, that's why I'm short..Because I don't sleep. But they are all about how my friends died. They're in my dreams telling me that it's my fault. And you know what? They're right." I said and let a single tear drop out of my eye.

"The other night you said you watched both your friends die... What happened? You were really fucking drunk the other night." He said.

"Well, I was out with my two friends, Scott and Lucinda, near the docks when there was a really violent shake to the ground. We ran to where there were a load of civilians looking up at the wall. I cannot forget the look of terror on their faces. When we all looked up, we saw a skinless titan, just with muscle. He kicked the gate in and that's when all hell broke loose. It was Scott's birthday and his parents were in my house, so we both sprinted to where the house was. When we got there, we saw our parents bodies, lifeless. Scott went into some form of shock and went to the house, ignoring my pleas for him to come back; that it wasn't safe, but he ignored me. When he was in the house, some of the roof collapsed and killed him. I could've dragged him back. When I ran to Lucinda's house, I saw her about to get grabbed by titan. I looked at it's face. It had a large grin, showing it's disgusting yellow teeth. I froze as I watched it rip her body. I could've called for her to run, but I didn't. I regret it so much." I let a couple of tears roll down my cheeks as I told him. He nodded and looked like he was thinking.

"Sir, if you don't mind. Please keep all those details to yourself. I don't want anyone else to pity me more than they already do." I said.

"I understand, cadet. But you're not alone. I saw my friends dead bodies." He said with pain, regret and remorse evidently lacing his tone.

"You can tell me, sir." I said knowing that he needed to get it off of his chest. I felt somewhat relieved when I told him about Scott and Lucinda.

"Okay, but same rules apply. Not a word to anyone." He said.

"Of course." I assured.

"I used to live in the underground district with my two friends, Isabel and Farlan. We were given a mission by someone from the overground: we had to retrieve documents from Erwin, then kill him. When we were outside the walls, it started raining. I told them both that I was going to get the job done. But, as I was riding towards where he was, I saw that there were titan's footprints heading towards the direction of the squad we were in. At this point, the rain was pouring down. When I got to the area, my horse threw me off and a slid across the mud. When I stooped I looked down and saw Isabel's head. I didn't know what to do. I saw the titan had someone in his mouth: Farlan. I still remember the last thing Isabel said to me 'We trust you, bro'. She was always so full of energy. When I killed the titan, after making sure it had gone through a shit ton of pain, Erwin came long. He knew the reasons we were here. But I joined. I would've been given over to the MP if I hadn't of." He told me. I smiled sympathetically.

"Sir, we're quite alike. How about we get rid of these titans together. For our friends." I said warmly. Then I saw something that could end wars. His smile. It was very small and was gone the moment it came, but I was glad that I made him smile.

"It's a deal, cadet." He said.

A/n: Almost....done....

Byeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!